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i feel so guilty
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<blockquote data-quote="Shari" data-source="post: 418430" data-attributes="member: 1848"><p>One thing I noticed, you said at one point you were upset that husband took his kids to leave and that wasnt fair and upset difficult child, yet you also say difficult child is very disrespectful of him. I always told difficult child 1 and easy child 1, when you guys treat me exactly the same, I'll treat you exactly the same. If difficult child is kind and loving to husband, yes...he should include her just like he does his kids when doing something. If she's an ass to him, heck yea he can leave her home. Same with one of his bios....</p><p> </p><p>It isn't great for kids to see parents fight on and on and on, but I think its also equally unhealthy for them to think they never do, either. Its most important for kids to see parents <em>fight fair. </em></p><p> </p><p>Everyone gets mad. So let's do it in a way that teaches the kids how to handle it. With Wee, we narrated our lives. "I am so angry right now, my car broke down and I have to fix it and I don't have time or money, OMG I would really like to hit something, but that is wrong, so I'm going to go for fast walk to cool down." We really did walk around and do that. And it really did help. And I don't think its wrong for a parent to say to another parent "I'm upset because I thought you were going to have supper ready and you don't. I'm tired, I'm grumpy, I'm upset." If we live in la-la-happy land, how else will kids that already have trouble learning "normal" responses to "normal" situations learn how to handle the rough spots.</p><p> </p><p>My .02. Probably not worth much more than that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shari, post: 418430, member: 1848"] One thing I noticed, you said at one point you were upset that husband took his kids to leave and that wasnt fair and upset difficult child, yet you also say difficult child is very disrespectful of him. I always told difficult child 1 and easy child 1, when you guys treat me exactly the same, I'll treat you exactly the same. If difficult child is kind and loving to husband, yes...he should include her just like he does his kids when doing something. If she's an ass to him, heck yea he can leave her home. Same with one of his bios.... It isn't great for kids to see parents fight on and on and on, but I think its also equally unhealthy for them to think they never do, either. Its most important for kids to see parents [I]fight fair. [/I] Everyone gets mad. So let's do it in a way that teaches the kids how to handle it. With Wee, we narrated our lives. "I am so angry right now, my car broke down and I have to fix it and I don't have time or money, OMG I would really like to hit something, but that is wrong, so I'm going to go for fast walk to cool down." We really did walk around and do that. And it really did help. And I don't think its wrong for a parent to say to another parent "I'm upset because I thought you were going to have supper ready and you don't. I'm tired, I'm grumpy, I'm upset." If we live in la-la-happy land, how else will kids that already have trouble learning "normal" responses to "normal" situations learn how to handle the rough spots. My .02. Probably not worth much more than that. [/QUOTE]
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