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Substance Abuse
I give up....
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<blockquote data-quote="so ready to live" data-source="post: 686268" data-attributes="member: 20054"><p>Colleen- my heart goes out to you. You are sad. For everybody. Isn't it odd, when they are young we say "boys will be boys" BUT NOW they aren't, they are men making man sized choices. Man sized choices with consequences, don't rob them of that part. Pick something small in the way of boundaries that you and hubs can both agree on and keep it.<strong> Keep it. </strong>It's definitely time for older son to move on and find his way-he's already "doing what he wants when he wants" isn't he? Is the support you provide simply helping him live this lifestyle? See if you both can switch from trying to control their behavior to something you can control -YOU. We realized after our son moved out (not by his choice) how utterly messed up our lives had become. Our home was a place of chaos for us all. Anytime we would hear his car come in we would shudder wondering "what next"? Drunk, drugged, angry? No sanctuary at our home and eventually we realized no way to live. We were sacrificing our home, our marriage and our sanity for his choices. When we gave up the illusion that we could/should fix it, we slowly healed. Prayers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="so ready to live, post: 686268, member: 20054"] Colleen- my heart goes out to you. You are sad. For everybody. Isn't it odd, when they are young we say "boys will be boys" BUT NOW they aren't, they are men making man sized choices. Man sized choices with consequences, don't rob them of that part. Pick something small in the way of boundaries that you and hubs can both agree on and keep it.[B] Keep it. [/B]It's definitely time for older son to move on and find his way-he's already "doing what he wants when he wants" isn't he? Is the support you provide simply helping him live this lifestyle? See if you both can switch from trying to control their behavior to something you can control -YOU. We realized after our son moved out (not by his choice) how utterly messed up our lives had become. Our home was a place of chaos for us all. Anytime we would hear his car come in we would shudder wondering "what next"? Drunk, drugged, angry? No sanctuary at our home and eventually we realized no way to live. We were sacrificing our home, our marriage and our sanity for his choices. When we gave up the illusion that we could/should fix it, we slowly healed. Prayers. [/QUOTE]
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I give up....
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