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General Parenting
I had it, I had it, I had...bad fight in house last night!
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 395845" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>That sounds like the tantrum that had to happen. While I don't condone yelling in front of the kids, and I do agree, your son's reaction is classic (we have had similar problems due to stress in our Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids) I really hope that the end result is productive. You had to do/say something, and perhaps this was the only way that was going to work, given all you've been trying to do while being undermined.</p><p></p><p>I've often said, sometimes things only work when you break the rules.</p><p></p><p>The problem is - you can't use this as a strategy. If you do, it's bad. But a boil-over like this as a last resort when you don't normally do this - it can work. It's the shock effect, "Mum never does this - it MUST be bad!" that gets results. But more than once, and it desensitised them, and you've lost your advantage.</p><p></p><p>Now you have to follow through and make some choices in how you manage. What will you continue to do for them? What do you require from them? Keep them accountable for agreed actions.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 395845, member: 1991"] That sounds like the tantrum that had to happen. While I don't condone yelling in front of the kids, and I do agree, your son's reaction is classic (we have had similar problems due to stress in our Pervasive Developmental Disorder (PDD) kids) I really hope that the end result is productive. You had to do/say something, and perhaps this was the only way that was going to work, given all you've been trying to do while being undermined. I've often said, sometimes things only work when you break the rules. The problem is - you can't use this as a strategy. If you do, it's bad. But a boil-over like this as a last resort when you don't normally do this - it can work. It's the shock effect, "Mum never does this - it MUST be bad!" that gets results. But more than once, and it desensitised them, and you've lost your advantage. Now you have to follow through and make some choices in how you manage. What will you continue to do for them? What do you require from them? Keep them accountable for agreed actions. Marg [/QUOTE]
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I had it, I had it, I had...bad fight in house last night!
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