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I had to turn my 20 yr old into the Police, heartbroken...
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<blockquote data-quote="elizabrary" data-source="post: 457156" data-attributes="member: 11235"><p>I called CPS on my daughter (for my granddaughter) three times- and it sucked. It was awful, but I knew it was the only thing I could do. She knew I was the one and she was angry, but currently she and my granddaughter are living with-me and she has a job and is back in school. That may all end tomorrow, who knows? But I know I did the right thing and you did too. She may be angry now, but eventually (hopefully) she will realize why you did what you did and she will feel bad for her actions. </p><p></p><p>Now, I am certainly not the queen of detachment, but I have made great strides over the last few years and I encourage you to work on detaching for yourself. If you don't know what that means there are threads on here about it and there are books and articles all over the place. Basically it's taking care of yourself first and letting the adult person in your life who is hell-bent on self-destruction live their own life. I try hard to remember not to do things for my adult daughter (who has a nearly 2-year-old) that she should be taking care of herself. It's very hard sometimes to watch her do stupid things and make mistakes, but that's how she has to learn. It is also important for me to be vigilant of my boundaries with her. Most of these kids are masters at completely ignoring boundaries and if I let one thing slip then she's on to the next until the boundaries no longer exist. </p><p></p><p>I'm sorry you're going through this, but you did the right thing for everyone involved. Do something nice for yourself- last time I had a horrible situation with-Kat I went out and bought myself a birthday cake and a bottle of wine and that was my dinner. And, no, it wasn't my birthday! But happy birthday to you!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="elizabrary, post: 457156, member: 11235"] I called CPS on my daughter (for my granddaughter) three times- and it sucked. It was awful, but I knew it was the only thing I could do. She knew I was the one and she was angry, but currently she and my granddaughter are living with-me and she has a job and is back in school. That may all end tomorrow, who knows? But I know I did the right thing and you did too. She may be angry now, but eventually (hopefully) she will realize why you did what you did and she will feel bad for her actions. Now, I am certainly not the queen of detachment, but I have made great strides over the last few years and I encourage you to work on detaching for yourself. If you don't know what that means there are threads on here about it and there are books and articles all over the place. Basically it's taking care of yourself first and letting the adult person in your life who is hell-bent on self-destruction live their own life. I try hard to remember not to do things for my adult daughter (who has a nearly 2-year-old) that she should be taking care of herself. It's very hard sometimes to watch her do stupid things and make mistakes, but that's how she has to learn. It is also important for me to be vigilant of my boundaries with her. Most of these kids are masters at completely ignoring boundaries and if I let one thing slip then she's on to the next until the boundaries no longer exist. I'm sorry you're going through this, but you did the right thing for everyone involved. Do something nice for yourself- last time I had a horrible situation with-Kat I went out and bought myself a birthday cake and a bottle of wine and that was my dinner. And, no, it wasn't my birthday! But happy birthday to you! [/QUOTE]
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I had to turn my 20 yr old into the Police, heartbroken...
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