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I HATE MONEY
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 631534" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I actually would have less of a problem if he got rude or angry. He's just upset. Like near tears, "I'm at the end of my rope, my life is awful" upset. </p><p></p><p>When he gets in these moods there's no getting him out of them. Any suggestion, exercise, TV, volunteering, eating, napping, taking a walk, play on the Wii, all get shot down. Which would be fine except he won't let it go. He won't shut up. He talks and talks and talks and there's nothing you can say. </p><p></p><p>It's exactly like when he was three and throwing a tantrum. If I'd try to pick him up he'd push me away. If I tried to walk away he'd grab my legs. (rinse and repeat) </p><p></p><p>That's what our night has been for the most part. It's "I have nothing. I called everyone I know and no one texted me back. All I said was I wanted to hang out but no one talked to me. I'm so alone. I have no one to talk to. I can't take a car so anyone who would hang out, I can't get to because it's too far to walk." <em>ad nauseam</em>. And knowing that this will all change when he gets work and then again has car access changes <em>NOTHING</em>. Because it's <em>NEVER </em>going to change when he's in these moods. </p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I don't do that. We are FB friends, but I've actually asked him to block me from posts he knows I don't want to see.</p><p></p><p>I don't actually think that drugs are the issue here. Yes, I do think he would love to smoke pot. He's not, because he knows he might need a drug test to get work. Although the term "dry drunk" comes to mind. Tonight he mentioned wanting to sit in the car and clean his pipe. (Apparently he finds that meditative.) I almost had a FIT...I kept my cool...but I don't know what exactly to do there, since he's not smoking at the moment...but he was told that there is to be NOTHING in our home so he better be getting rid of it. </p><p></p><p>Finally about 7:15 my husband and I made the excuse of going to empty the dehumidifiers at the church (we work part-time as the custodians of our church) and go get some food. We actually did need to, but it's hardly a two-person job - we just both needed desperately to get away from him. We actually considered crashing the CODA meeting that meets Thursdays at our church...but it was 25 minutes in and that seemed wrong. Anyway, we never got food, husband is cooking now because I just don't care.</p><p></p><p>He was in a better mood when we got back...but it's iffy. He's still very ticked at his "friends" who are ignoring him and his computer is acting up. But he's quit talking to us. This is an improvement.</p><p></p><p>It's been a long night.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 631534, member: 17309"] I actually would have less of a problem if he got rude or angry. He's just upset. Like near tears, "I'm at the end of my rope, my life is awful" upset. When he gets in these moods there's no getting him out of them. Any suggestion, exercise, TV, volunteering, eating, napping, taking a walk, play on the Wii, all get shot down. Which would be fine except he won't let it go. He won't shut up. He talks and talks and talks and there's nothing you can say. It's exactly like when he was three and throwing a tantrum. If I'd try to pick him up he'd push me away. If I tried to walk away he'd grab my legs. (rinse and repeat) That's what our night has been for the most part. It's "I have nothing. I called everyone I know and no one texted me back. All I said was I wanted to hang out but no one talked to me. I'm so alone. I have no one to talk to. I can't take a car so anyone who would hang out, I can't get to because it's too far to walk." [I]ad nauseam[/I]. And knowing that this will all change when he gets work and then again has car access changes [I]NOTHING[/I]. Because it's [I]NEVER [/I]going to change when he's in these moods. I don't do that. We are FB friends, but I've actually asked him to block me from posts he knows I don't want to see. I don't actually think that drugs are the issue here. Yes, I do think he would love to smoke pot. He's not, because he knows he might need a drug test to get work. Although the term "dry drunk" comes to mind. Tonight he mentioned wanting to sit in the car and clean his pipe. (Apparently he finds that meditative.) I almost had a FIT...I kept my cool...but I don't know what exactly to do there, since he's not smoking at the moment...but he was told that there is to be NOTHING in our home so he better be getting rid of it. Finally about 7:15 my husband and I made the excuse of going to empty the dehumidifiers at the church (we work part-time as the custodians of our church) and go get some food. We actually did need to, but it's hardly a two-person job - we just both needed desperately to get away from him. We actually considered crashing the CODA meeting that meets Thursdays at our church...but it was 25 minutes in and that seemed wrong. Anyway, we never got food, husband is cooking now because I just don't care. He was in a better mood when we got back...but it's iffy. He's still very ticked at his "friends" who are ignoring him and his computer is acting up. But he's quit talking to us. This is an improvement. It's been a long night. [/QUOTE]
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