I HAVE to get this out of my system

[mrscatinthehat]

so sorry you are dealing with this. Blogs can catch you off guard. The ones I was reading after difficult child 2 did what he did made me feel ill. But like you I couldn't get away from them. Thankfully when I responded people just thought I was a friend of the family.

Now I do want to add just a note that may or may not help but even if your Aunt did question her vocation would that be bad. They say that Mother Theresa questioned her faith also. Not in a bad way but just that she wasn't sure she was doing all she could have. (As if that were the problem from where we sit.) Not that she would have changed things but that she just wanted more out of herself for God. Without knowing your family IF something of the sort could have been said it might have been in that context and your sister wouldn't even get it. And it would make your Aunt even more devout.

Just a different way to look at it. Try and avoid responding. I do know how hard it is.

Hugs
Beth

 

[Marguerite]

Stay off the site. Pretend you have dropped off the face of the earth. Not only don't respond to her, don't respond to ANYTHING.

Think about it from her point of view - if she believes this ****, there is still a part of her that is narcissistic and also wanting you to feel as if she is the sane, sensible one in the family. Therefore she NEEDS to know that she has got through to you, that you have read her post. If you fail to respond, if you drop off the face of the earth, she has no way of knowing if she got to you or not. It will really eat at her. Chances are she will then post again, and maybe even again, taunting you ("Are you too cowardly to respond? I will assume your silence means you now agree with me") but even if she does this, DO NOT RESPOND.

I am telling you this from experience. On a forum I used to post on some years ago (and a forum now defunct) I found my posts being attacked like this, apparently totally out of the blue. I couldn't work out why an apparently innocent comment was being twisted and manipulated, then making me look really bad. At first I replied, and the problem began to spread to every post of mine in the site. I had friends reply to her and she accused them of being me in disguise. Aha! A clue - all the attacks seemed to come from different people, but the more was written, the more I began to recognise the same phrases and also recalled hearing them in someone I thought was a friend.

Realising that the site moderator wasn't going to fix things, I stopped posting entirely, even when she began to taunt me for my sudden silence. She did copy some of what I'd written and emailed it to people with her own added comments making it look like I'd been targetting people publicly, so I had some friends I met on the street who challenged me and got angry with me. She really did her best to damage me.

But the best thing I could have done, was stop responding. That way she never realised I was on to her. And also, the more she posted and taunted, the more her true colours became obvious to everybody.

Without anyone to bounce off, she eventually lost interest. Thankfully, she has now left town and I no longer encounter her anywhere. But I also never use my real name on any forum, so she (and others) can't track me.

If you respond, this will escalate and you will get hurt. I used to look at each of her new posts and feel physically sick. Once I worked out who it was and stopped replying, I began to feel in control again.

Marg

 

[Star*]

So what did yer Aunts husband say to do?

 

[nvts]

Ok, here's the latest and greatest!

You guys are the greatest! I took some of your advise and didn't post anything more, but I still had to read the garbage she's writing. She's absolutely certifiable. Did you know that my sister has just about CURED autism and it's tendancies in her boyfriends niece! Thank the gods! She'll be in the New England Journal of Medicine!! lol

She has more time and experience with "special" children than me and my other sister COMBINED! I have to say, I was in stitches!

But I held my ground and didn't post - just like you guys and my dad said to.

Well, had to look at the car accident this morning (I can't help it - she brought my kids into it and I just have to look), one of my older cousins (who I don't think Wacko knows reads the forums) ripped her a new one in a calm and peaceful way. Someone wrote back that Psycho has to be right because she's family and my cousin simply responded with "so am I" and tastefully left it at that!

So many of you mentioned Karma and were right!

STAR: You are so funny (Shari too!)! My aunts husband (for those who remember: she was a nun) would want me to be kind. I guess that's what prompted me to post on here so I could get it out of my system before I did/said something stupid!

I love you guys! (ok, I'm not being all that kind because I'm still laughing at the response from my cousin!)!

Beth