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Parent Emeritus
I keep forgetting... the premise of "the rescuers" is that we, the parents, are evil!
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 331355"><p>We too have an adopted difficult child. She has a good heart...but is difficult child all the way.</p><p></p><p>What a GREAT comment you have come up! Kudos to you and your husband. AND another good thing, is that as near as I can "figure," it is truthful.</p><p></p><p>With my difficult child, I have (for the time being) figured out a weird way of providing some <u><strong>very limited</strong></u> help because I believe that she is (to a large extent) disabled and she (to a large extent) makes real effort to improve and is respectful to husband and myself. AT any point in time, should she not try her best or is disrespectful to me...well, I pull back.</p><p></p><p>I draw the line and draw it clear when it comes to enabling and/or entitlement which she certainly is prone to. Doesn't do her any good and it certainly has never done husband and myself any good either.</p><p></p><p>Over the years we have had our share of clueless, heartless and cruel "budinskies" who made comments that tended to get under my skin. I could care less these days cause I have been through way too much and life is too short. Ironically, at this point in time, sooo many of these same people have either been burned themselves by difficult child or have witnessed very weird behavior with their own eyes, that they at least have a decent understanding of it now and keep quiet.</p><p></p><p>With "outsiders," I usually say very little...with those that have some general knowledge...I say that some days are better than others. It's GOOD to have a "line" that requires no further comment/discussion (as you have done).</p><p></p><p>How WONDERFUL that you had such a great holiday!!!! And how wonderful that you are enjoying the empty nest period. We are doing the same...and interestingly, also have a bio child who graduated college with- honors. </p><p></p><p>Certainly hope the best for your entire family....but think it is totally awesome that you have pushed forward and are enjoying life to the fullest! We are doing the same.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 331355"] We too have an adopted difficult child. She has a good heart...but is difficult child all the way. What a GREAT comment you have come up! Kudos to you and your husband. AND another good thing, is that as near as I can "figure," it is truthful. With my difficult child, I have (for the time being) figured out a weird way of providing some [U][B]very limited[/B][/U] help because I believe that she is (to a large extent) disabled and she (to a large extent) makes real effort to improve and is respectful to husband and myself. AT any point in time, should she not try her best or is disrespectful to me...well, I pull back. I draw the line and draw it clear when it comes to enabling and/or entitlement which she certainly is prone to. Doesn't do her any good and it certainly has never done husband and myself any good either. Over the years we have had our share of clueless, heartless and cruel "budinskies" who made comments that tended to get under my skin. I could care less these days cause I have been through way too much and life is too short. Ironically, at this point in time, sooo many of these same people have either been burned themselves by difficult child or have witnessed very weird behavior with their own eyes, that they at least have a decent understanding of it now and keep quiet. With "outsiders," I usually say very little...with those that have some general knowledge...I say that some days are better than others. It's GOOD to have a "line" that requires no further comment/discussion (as you have done). How WONDERFUL that you had such a great holiday!!!! And how wonderful that you are enjoying the empty nest period. We are doing the same...and interestingly, also have a bio child who graduated college with- honors. Certainly hope the best for your entire family....but think it is totally awesome that you have pushed forward and are enjoying life to the fullest! We are doing the same. [/QUOTE]
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I keep forgetting... the premise of "the rescuers" is that we, the parents, are evil!
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