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General Parenting
I love my Life - I am the boyfiend
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<blockquote data-quote="meowbunny" data-source="post: 122332" data-attributes="member: 3626"><p>Welcome! Be brave and start your own id. It will make it easier for us to know who we're talking to and easier for you to respond as you.</p><p> </p><p>You've already gotten a lot of good advice. The one thing I can suggest is that you not be a dad, but rather an uncle in her life. I was with a man I adored. I would have married him in a heartbeat had I not had my daughter. I told him repeatedly to not discipline her -- she was my daughter and I would do what was necessary. He could talk to me, make suggestions in private but do little otherwise for now. It was the only way my daughter would ever learn to accept him. He decided he needed to be her dad from day one. It ended our relationship. She hated him and she had to come first at that time.</p><p> </p><p>Had he been more like an uncle, I think we all could have survived. That is, he could be there to offer her advice and an ear if she asked for it. If she was doing something dangerous to herself or others, he would jump in as my brother would have. He would leave the day-to-day parenting to me. I knew my child best. It also would have given my daughter someone she could sound off to when she needed it, an adult who wasn't a therapist, a teacher or a mentor -- a buddy she could goof off with and just giggle and kid around with. </p><p> </p><p>For now, fill that role of uncle. As time progresses and your relationship goes even deeper, your role with her daughter will increase and you will be able to be more of a father.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="meowbunny, post: 122332, member: 3626"] Welcome! Be brave and start your own id. It will make it easier for us to know who we're talking to and easier for you to respond as you. You've already gotten a lot of good advice. The one thing I can suggest is that you not be a dad, but rather an uncle in her life. I was with a man I adored. I would have married him in a heartbeat had I not had my daughter. I told him repeatedly to not discipline her -- she was my daughter and I would do what was necessary. He could talk to me, make suggestions in private but do little otherwise for now. It was the only way my daughter would ever learn to accept him. He decided he needed to be her dad from day one. It ended our relationship. She hated him and she had to come first at that time. Had he been more like an uncle, I think we all could have survived. That is, he could be there to offer her advice and an ear if she asked for it. If she was doing something dangerous to herself or others, he would jump in as my brother would have. He would leave the day-to-day parenting to me. I knew my child best. It also would have given my daughter someone she could sound off to when she needed it, an adult who wasn't a therapist, a teacher or a mentor -- a buddy she could goof off with and just giggle and kid around with. For now, fill that role of uncle. As time progresses and your relationship goes even deeper, your role with her daughter will increase and you will be able to be more of a father. [/QUOTE]
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