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i made a mistake with difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="Rotsne" data-source="post: 221271" data-attributes="member: 6326"><p>Well, my daughter is home today, while her class performs the play.</p><p> </p><p>From the very start I have made the teacher understand that if she wants to put stress on her by giving her leading roles or something like that, she better have a reserve ready, because with her not comfortable by standing in front of a crowd, I will pull her if there should be problems.</p><p> </p><p>We are working class people (In Denmark we have social classes) and for us it is not considered good manner to promote ourselves. We are workers and our primare goal in life is to serve without people notice us. Kids with from higher classes with better social heritage should be considered for such roles before us.</p><p> </p><p>Well, she was given a lead role and did not understand how to decline the request (She didn't apply for the role in the first place) because she was afraid to disappoint the teacher. We were not sure if she could manage the task and asked more than 1,000 times if she was totally sure because we were concerned that she could ask for too much of herself. As the premiere became closer we could see her health decline. Last night it was really bad, so I pulled her by stating that she was sick.</p><p> </p><p>Our family coach which knows our social background agree with us. She also believe that our daughter can not grow up being a quiet faithful worker if she are encourged to follow unrealistic dreams about her future. </p><p> </p><p>Right now here in Denmark at lot of young adults gets exams they cannot afford to use, because without proper finance from their home they take loans and work hard to get an good education but an education that comes with a burden of loans, which would send them out on the street once they have to start to pay it back. So they have to stay on welfare or low paying job - basically having a McJob career - so they can protect themselves against the creditors. We won't have that for our daughter.</p><p> </p><p>Second of all singing and dancing is not a part of my religion. I belong to the evangelical branch of the Danish state church where we are not dancing around the Christmas tree and listening to music on the radio. So I couldn't support her into participating even if she didn't have the problem.</p><p> </p><p>She is very happy about my choice. Sometimes teenagers need an adult to step in and do the hard decisions for them. In fact many times they expect us to intervene without being able to express it verbally.</p><p> </p><p>I don't think that you should care what the other people thinks. The welfare of your children must be your first priority. Good luck with your choice.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rotsne, post: 221271, member: 6326"] Well, my daughter is home today, while her class performs the play. From the very start I have made the teacher understand that if she wants to put stress on her by giving her leading roles or something like that, she better have a reserve ready, because with her not comfortable by standing in front of a crowd, I will pull her if there should be problems. We are working class people (In Denmark we have social classes) and for us it is not considered good manner to promote ourselves. We are workers and our primare goal in life is to serve without people notice us. Kids with from higher classes with better social heritage should be considered for such roles before us. Well, she was given a lead role and did not understand how to decline the request (She didn't apply for the role in the first place) because she was afraid to disappoint the teacher. We were not sure if she could manage the task and asked more than 1,000 times if she was totally sure because we were concerned that she could ask for too much of herself. As the premiere became closer we could see her health decline. Last night it was really bad, so I pulled her by stating that she was sick. Our family coach which knows our social background agree with us. She also believe that our daughter can not grow up being a quiet faithful worker if she are encourged to follow unrealistic dreams about her future. Right now here in Denmark at lot of young adults gets exams they cannot afford to use, because without proper finance from their home they take loans and work hard to get an good education but an education that comes with a burden of loans, which would send them out on the street once they have to start to pay it back. So they have to stay on welfare or low paying job - basically having a McJob career - so they can protect themselves against the creditors. We won't have that for our daughter. Second of all singing and dancing is not a part of my religion. I belong to the evangelical branch of the Danish state church where we are not dancing around the Christmas tree and listening to music on the radio. So I couldn't support her into participating even if she didn't have the problem. She is very happy about my choice. Sometimes teenagers need an adult to step in and do the hard decisions for them. In fact many times they expect us to intervene without being able to express it verbally. I don't think that you should care what the other people thinks. The welfare of your children must be your first priority. Good luck with your choice. [/QUOTE]
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