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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 454573" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>Money doesn't usually solve problems, but a lack of money definitely <u>causes</u> problems! (been there done that)</p><p></p><p>Try and look at this from the kid(s) perspective... maybe they see it as: ever since YOU came around, things have gone downhill? No idea what their situation was before you came along... but when you and girlfriend moved in together... you were soon without work and $$ has been a problem ever since. They don't understand the condition of the economy etc. They don't know what its like to hunt for a job, to fight of creditors, etc. All they know is that they are "different" from the other kids at school, and they HATE it. I'm just guessing here... You'll have to write your own script. But try and put yourself in their shoes. It might give you some clues about what they are thinking and why.</p><p></p><p>We know what its like to stretch the dollar every single minute - and have the kids screaming blue murder about it. We took time to listen... DS is prepared to wear thrift-store second-hand jeans... as long as he has ONE "new" pair that he can wear once in a while at school. Rationale: He can then say that he wears rattier jeans because of shop class - and it doesn't look like its because we can't afford "good" jeans. Know what I mean?? So, we really hunt down sale and clearance racks now, and make sure that he has ONE "new" pair that fits - and he no longer complains about the rest of his jeans.</p><p></p><p>Maybe the kids need to be able to have a "junk breakfast" on one specific morning a week (Saturday?). Then, when the other kids are talking about liking X over Y etc., they will be able to enter into the conversation. What did you have today becomes... well, mean step-parent won't let me have that on school days, but on Saturdays we get to pick... comes off WAY better at school.</p><p></p><p>Kids are mean - as in, the other kids may be mean to your GFs kids because of the situation. How can you help them work through what they face at school?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 454573, member: 11791"] Money doesn't usually solve problems, but a lack of money definitely [U]causes[/U] problems! (been there done that) Try and look at this from the kid(s) perspective... maybe they see it as: ever since YOU came around, things have gone downhill? No idea what their situation was before you came along... but when you and girlfriend moved in together... you were soon without work and $$ has been a problem ever since. They don't understand the condition of the economy etc. They don't know what its like to hunt for a job, to fight of creditors, etc. All they know is that they are "different" from the other kids at school, and they HATE it. I'm just guessing here... You'll have to write your own script. But try and put yourself in their shoes. It might give you some clues about what they are thinking and why. We know what its like to stretch the dollar every single minute - and have the kids screaming blue murder about it. We took time to listen... DS is prepared to wear thrift-store second-hand jeans... as long as he has ONE "new" pair that he can wear once in a while at school. Rationale: He can then say that he wears rattier jeans because of shop class - and it doesn't look like its because we can't afford "good" jeans. Know what I mean?? So, we really hunt down sale and clearance racks now, and make sure that he has ONE "new" pair that fits - and he no longer complains about the rest of his jeans. Maybe the kids need to be able to have a "junk breakfast" on one specific morning a week (Saturday?). Then, when the other kids are talking about liking X over Y etc., they will be able to enter into the conversation. What did you have today becomes... well, mean step-parent won't let me have that on school days, but on Saturdays we get to pick... comes off WAY better at school. Kids are mean - as in, the other kids may be mean to your GFs kids because of the situation. How can you help them work through what they face at school? [/QUOTE]
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