I am really worn out. My 4 year old has been having behavior issues since she was walking. It has only recently come to light that ODD might be the underlying cause of what we experience EVERY day with her. There has been no diagnosis, but ODD is the only thing that truly explains her. My husband and I have begun using "accountable kids" to help structure our days and it helps, a little. We have been using "1,2,3 Magic" for about 2 years and it helps, a little. We went on a multiple food elimination diet and it helped, a little. My point? The behavior has not changed but seems to have gotten worse as she grows older. After a very tough day today with tears and screaming, I am tired and feel desperate. She is a beautiful child, but after the really hard days, I cry for her because she seems so unhappy about everything, not in a depressed kind of way but because, in her mind, she never gets what she wants. For example, tonight we were coming home from the library. She cried and whined the ENTIRE drive home simply because we were going home. She wanted to go somewhere else. Then she asked for ice cream, I said no because she did not eat any dinner (more screams and cries). When we got home I asked her to try to finish her dinner (more screams and cries). I asked her to put on her pj's (more of the same). On and on....My baby is miserable and I don't know what to do anymore. Sometimes I don't want to even engage with her because it will turn into a tantrum and tears. Many times I lose my temper and then the guilt comes crashing in like a tidal wave. Can I really be such a bad mother? But my other kids seem normal. I can say no to them and it is no big deal. I used to homeschool, but seeing her increasing problems, I put the others in public school so that I can have more time for her. It is not better.
Please, does anyone have any comforting words for a mother who feels helpless?
Please, does anyone have any comforting words for a mother who feels helpless?