difficult child 2 is....exhausting....infuriating....and any other adjective you can think of along those lines. He doesn't seem to think the rules apply to him. He says what everyone wants to hear, but has no intention of following through. He uses and takes advantage of the goodness of others. You can't believe a word he says. He 'lost' his adderall a week and a half ago. And he mysteriously has money. He 'bounced' away this weekend...which means he had permission to go somewhere on Friday and was supposed to be home Friday night. He called his mom and told her he wasn't coming home; that he'd be home by noon Saturday. Saturday he tells her he'll be home "sometime tomorrow night". He does this about every other weekend. Then complains that he doesn't get to do anything even though he's busting his [butt] to do the right thing. He has a long list of reasons why he's doing this and it's all about how he's not treated fairly, that he doesn't get to do anything, blah, blah, blah. The same old tired argument over and over and over. I've told him repeatedly that he doesn't give us a chance to allow him to do things because he just takes it (i.e., 'bouncing' away). And an hour of school doesn't count as busting your [butt]. An hour and a half of community service doesn't count. He still has 28 hours to complete. He worked an hour and a half and then left because he got sweaty. He talks to his mother in a horrible manner. When she told him that she was making a list of house rules this weekend for all of her kids and it would include bedtimes, etc, he told her flat out that he was NOT going to have a bedtime and he was NOT going to have this or that. This particular bounce, however, may be the final straw. This time he involved the SW from the wrap around services. At the group meeting on Thursday, he asked the SW if he would drop him in [town] after the home meeting. Needless to say, I was floored when I found out he asked him to do that. The SW came to the meeting on Friday and said he thought he was taking difficult child 2 to an appointment; however, since he had already said yes, he would take him to [town], but he wouldn't do it again. difficult child 2 said all the right things at the meeting. And then he bounces. We know what town he's in, just not where exactly. When he comes home from [town], he sleeps for days. I'm pretty sure he's doing drugs while there. He's on probation. However, he does not currently have a PO because the probation is in the process of being transferred from another county. He should have a PO next week. He also sees the new psychiatrist next week. We know he's not on the right medications. However, he knows right from wrong. He just doesn't care. It's all about me, myself and I. When his mom told me last night that he wasn't coming home - that he'd be home by noon today (which I figured wouldn't happen), I told her "Ok. I'm done." And I felt calm and relaxed. Every other time, I'd be angry and frustated...my pain would kick up, I would toss and turn at night. I think detachment just kicked in. Self-preservation, had enough...I don't know. But...he's 16. What do you do with a kid that won't help himself? He's been in foster care because of running away. He ran away from foster care - more than once. They put him in a program and he ran away from there 3 times. Then they (the county) put him in a lockdown Residential Treatment Center (RTC) for dual-diagnosis. It was a step-down from JDC. He was there for 5 or 6 months. He was out for less than a week when he bounced away again, so he was on an ankle monitor for a couple months. I find myself thinking he's a lost cause. I asked his mom if she ever thinks that way and she said she does sometimes. She hasn't wanted to violate him because JDC certainly won't be beneficial, but what else do you do with this kid? He has no interest in helping himself. His thinking is that he's going to do what he wants to do and he'll be fine and everyone should just back off. He isn't doing school (online school), he isn't doing his community service, he's taking off all the time, he barely participates in the home meetings. He's only 16. I've known him for almost 10 years and I've always had a special bond with him. But, I don't know if I want to go to the home meeting next week. What's the point? He's just going to lie and say what everyone wants to hear, then turn around and do whatever he wants. I don't know how much I want to be involved. I *really* don't like being lied to and taken advantage of. What do you do in a situation like this? Seriously, this kid is a hard case. He does not care about anything except about what he wants to do.