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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 364949" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>Jo, make it uncomfortable enough and they will leave on their own. For the one who isn't working, give them LOTS of work to do around the house..........LOTS. When the complaints come, and they will, simply state that there is no such thing as a free lunch, someone has always got to pay the tab......... As for the other......pretty much the same thing. If that doesn't work, you'll have to set that deadline.</p><p></p><p>I set it with Nichole. When she went off the deep end I regretted it. But when I forced myself to look at it objectively, it would have happened if she had been living here........her being on her own didn't matter. And seriously, I don't think she'd have ever moved out if I'd not set the date.</p><p></p><p>And as for the deep end part that made me feel so guilty............Has turned out to be one of the best life learning experiences for her. She has grown up by leaps and bounds and finally left teenhood behind. She has finally "got" that her behavior affects everyone she cares about, not just herself. And she is no longer ruled by her moods or feelings. She now stops to think things thru and look at the potential consequences of her actions. She is a better mother to Aubrey, and a better partner to boyfriend. And she has become a joy to be around. </p><p></p><p>Nichole needed me to draw the line in the sand. The adult world frightened her too much to step out into it on her own.</p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 364949, member: 84"] Jo, make it uncomfortable enough and they will leave on their own. For the one who isn't working, give them LOTS of work to do around the house..........LOTS. When the complaints come, and they will, simply state that there is no such thing as a free lunch, someone has always got to pay the tab......... As for the other......pretty much the same thing. If that doesn't work, you'll have to set that deadline. I set it with Nichole. When she went off the deep end I regretted it. But when I forced myself to look at it objectively, it would have happened if she had been living here........her being on her own didn't matter. And seriously, I don't think she'd have ever moved out if I'd not set the date. And as for the deep end part that made me feel so guilty............Has turned out to be one of the best life learning experiences for her. She has grown up by leaps and bounds and finally left teenhood behind. She has finally "got" that her behavior affects everyone she cares about, not just herself. And she is no longer ruled by her moods or feelings. She now stops to think things thru and look at the potential consequences of her actions. She is a better mother to Aubrey, and a better partner to boyfriend. And she has become a joy to be around. Nichole needed me to draw the line in the sand. The adult world frightened her too much to step out into it on her own. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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