I want to talk about bras

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flutterbee

Guest
Until I put on weight, I've always been an A cup. My ex used to call me skeeter cause he said it was like I had 2 mosquito bites. That's ok; I just called him pee wee. (by the way, his current wife has less up top than me, no curves and looks like she's been hit in the face by a Mack truck. But, I digress.)

Anyway, when you're that small you only wear a bra for 2 reasons: 1) so people can't tell when you're cold and 2) to give the illusion that there is actually something there. It's certainly not for lift or support.

So, now that I've put on some weight and have made it to a B cup (Woo Hoo!), I've had to buy new bras. Not many bras in an A cup fasten in the front, thus I never had one. Well, one of the bras I got fastens in the front.

You have to be a flippin' contortionist to get the thing on without it getting all twisted around and upside down. I tried fastening it and then pulling the straps up, but it's a racer back (is that what it's called?) and unless you can pull your shoulder out of socket at will, that's not happening.

Is there some trick I don't know about? You should see me with this thing (or not). Standing in front of the full length mirror all twisted around trying to grab the other side of the bra and untwist it at the same time. Look like a dog trying to catch it's tail...end up turning in circles going after the darn thing.
 
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flutterbee

Guest
I wore those when I was pregnant with easy child and LOVED them. I haven't been able to find one since that fits comfortably. They always seem to ride up. I'll keep looking, though.
 

Steely

Active Member

A dog chasing it's tail..........OhMy.
:rofl:
Isn't the front clip easier than the back? I don't get it. At least you can see what you are doing?! :wink:
 

TerryJ2

Well-Known Member
I used to put them on around my waist so the clip was in front, clip them, turn them around, then put my arms through the straps and pull up at the same time.

Your post is hysterical. Love it!
 
Terry, that is how I have to do it.

Because my bras are huge. I can't reach behind me to snap them.

In fact, they are made in Germany, by the same company that makes the German Army's armor.

I'm not kidding. I have to order them special.

But a bra this big is not called a bra over there.

It's called a schtuppsemfrumfloppen.
 
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flutterbee

Guest
The ones that hook in the back are way easier. It's not the hook that's the problem. It's getting the stupid thing on without it being twisted in the back and then you finally get the other strap on just to find that the cup is upside down. I tell ya...I can't do it without my glasses on. :rofl:
 
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flutterbee

Guest
So, BBK, are you saying that your bras could double as a helmet?

I'm glad you all were amused by my post. :smile: I promise, it's way more entertaining in action. If I weren't so busy cursing the darn thing, I'd be laughing, too.
 

mrscatinthehat

Seussical
Oh my. I gave up on the front clasp ones. 1) not enough support. 2) I blew one out at work years ago and spent half an hour in the restroom with paperclips etc rigging it to not fall off. (Cuz going without is sooo not an option.) They sure look cute but somehow I think they engineered them wrong when they made the front clasp ones.

beth
 

wakeupcall

Well-Known Member
BBK, it's 5:00 AM on Monday morning......your post made me fall off my stool at the breakfast bar, laughing! OMGosh....that post was soooooooooooooo funny and I "got" the name of your bra! You girls are very creative! Heck, I could go without and no one would know.
 

goldenguru

Active Member
OMG what a funny post. :rofl:

I'm with BBK. What I wouldn't give to wear a B cup bra. My bra size has more D's in it that Donald Duck's name. I kid you not.

BBK: In english I assume that transliterates to "keeps'emfromflopsen" - yes?

I would trade my mother bozos for a nice small set of boys that are comfortable to wear. *sigh*

Maybe the header on this post should warn our few male friends that this is ladies talk ... it might be a little embarassing for them. LOl :rofl:
 
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flutterbee

Guest
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Originally Posted By: goldenguru</div><div class="ubbcode-body">Maybe the header on this post should warn our few male friends that this is ladies talk ... it might be a little embarassing for them. LOl </div></div>

I assumed that the word 'bras' in the thread title would take care of that. :wink:

I got BBK's name, too. But, since they're made my a German armor company, I figured that in a pinch they could double as a helmet. You know...in case you suddenly find yourself behind enemy lines or something. A lady should always be prepared.
 

Hound dog

Nana's are Beautiful
<div class="ubbcode-block"><div class="ubbcode-header">Quote:</div><div class="ubbcode-body"> You have to be a flippin' contortionist to get the thing on without it getting all twisted around and upside down. </div></div>


:rofl: :rofl:

Exactly why I won't wear a front clasp bra.
 

hearts and roses

Mind Reader
Heather you are not alone. I hate the front clasping ones and gave up on them after easy child was born - I had no time for fussing! And mine were full B's, then my girls nursed 'em till they were empty - now I am lucky if I can wear a tight A or a loose B. I can wear only one bra and not feel weird about how my clothes hang on me....the VS Very Sexy Bra. I buy two a year and rotate them because they are so pricey. Once in a while I luck out and but an extra when they are on sale which is almost never (I actually have four right now!).

One day, easy child was in the fitting room at Filenes (now Macys) and from within she shouted out to me, "Mom, can we stop at Walgreens on the way home?"

Me: "Sure, what do you need?"

easy child: "I have to pick up some calamine lotion for these mosquito bites on my chest"

The entire fitting room burst into laughter. That'll teach her!

easy child thanks me almost daily for passing my tiny boobies on to her. difficult child lucked out and got her paternal gramma's genes - little boulders, which she never misses an opportunity to show off! Witch with a B!
 
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