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<blockquote data-quote="witzend" data-source="post: 598379" data-attributes="member: 99"><p>While I was driving home from L telling me that I was "never much of a mother" to her and she didn't want me to be her Mother of the Bride or have any part in her wedding, talking to husband on the phone about what had happened, leaving a VM for her dad as to what she had done, L was making a <em>date</em> on FB with a boyfriend - not the guy she was marrying - to come over and meet her sweet new puppy. Now, mind you, this is a girl whose father paid her rent, car, gas, insurance, plus a $2k allowance every month from the time she was 17 until aged 25. I suspect if you don't indulge your difficult child quite so badly that <em>he</em> will have a chance to outgrow this. You never know.</p><p></p><p>One thing I think is important to consider is what are you legally liable for in your state? When M went and moved in with a friend's idiot mother when he was 17 years old, we made her sign an agreement that if he caused her or her home or any of her belongings any harm that she would not hold us liable for it. Legally it held no water because we did not give custody of him to her. (Dumb woman kept him for 2.5 years...) But she never once called us on any of the stuff he pulled on her, and it got back to us that he was doing her the same way he did us.</p><p></p><p>Check your laws. Spend that little bit of money for a consult with an attorney just to be sure. It's possible if your difficult child is drinking and someone falls asleep with a cigarette and burns something down, or gets in a fight and hurts someone that you will be financially responsible for that. Reporting him as a runaway or an incorrigible minor could save your bacon in that case. <em>Let</em> the police pick him up. <em>Let</em> him have a hissy fit and say he'll never come home - they won't force him. Tell them you are afraid for your safety if he says he wants to come home (he won't). But by all means, do what you have to in order to protect your fiscal security from him.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="witzend, post: 598379, member: 99"] While I was driving home from L telling me that I was "never much of a mother" to her and she didn't want me to be her Mother of the Bride or have any part in her wedding, talking to husband on the phone about what had happened, leaving a VM for her dad as to what she had done, L was making a [I]date[/I] on FB with a boyfriend - not the guy she was marrying - to come over and meet her sweet new puppy. Now, mind you, this is a girl whose father paid her rent, car, gas, insurance, plus a $2k allowance every month from the time she was 17 until aged 25. I suspect if you don't indulge your difficult child quite so badly that [I]he[/I] will have a chance to outgrow this. You never know. One thing I think is important to consider is what are you legally liable for in your state? When M went and moved in with a friend's idiot mother when he was 17 years old, we made her sign an agreement that if he caused her or her home or any of her belongings any harm that she would not hold us liable for it. Legally it held no water because we did not give custody of him to her. (Dumb woman kept him for 2.5 years...) But she never once called us on any of the stuff he pulled on her, and it got back to us that he was doing her the same way he did us. Check your laws. Spend that little bit of money for a consult with an attorney just to be sure. It's possible if your difficult child is drinking and someone falls asleep with a cigarette and burns something down, or gets in a fight and hurts someone that you will be financially responsible for that. Reporting him as a runaway or an incorrigible minor could save your bacon in that case. [I]Let[/I] the police pick him up. [I]Let[/I] him have a hissy fit and say he'll never come home - they won't force him. Tell them you are afraid for your safety if he says he wants to come home (he won't). But by all means, do what you have to in order to protect your fiscal security from him. [/QUOTE]
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