Well, I am brand new here, and I am starting a thread. Obviously, its going to take me a long time to read through all of them, but so far, i consider you parents to have Dalai Lama strength. How do you do it?? I have been cohabitating (pagan married) to my husband for 4 years. The first year, We had his then 11y/o difficult children little girl, and i thought the ex-wife of husband was just a nasty piece- locking the difficult children in her room, then letting her wander all over a neighborhood. Ex of husband is not difficult children mother. Boy do i understand her now! difficult children started out seemingly normal- but everything changed within 3 weeks. She got in fights at school, manipulated all kinds of situations, then eventually hurt herself because i made her copy words from the dictionary after she smart mouthed me. When she hurt herself, she went to school and blamed it on me and husband, and was taken into state custody for several days. At that time, she was talking to other kids, and they told her to tell the Social workers she had been sexually abused by my son and husband to "get us in more trouble". My son (easy child) was graduating in about a year-with a great life ahead, couldn't take the chance. So we sent her back to her grandmother- and then found out difficult children mom was back in the picture. Long story longer- we left her there for 2 1/2 years, until the drug addicted prostitutes and their johns could no longer deal with her- I quote, "she embarasses us by her behavior, and we can't have her around" (really! Horrible people who do horrible things were actually scandalized by difficult child) and she came back, and straight into treatment. I am not equipped to handle her. The drugs aren't working. The meltdowns are awful. The defiance is unholy. difficult child threatened suicide last night- and i thought, "if only". So today i am seeking help, because i cant deal with it anymore. No one will take her, not residential programs, because she works them- says, I didn't say i was suicidal- your making it up..so they wont take her. Help.