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I'd like to talk about acceptance
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<blockquote data-quote="Albatross" data-source="post: 626046" data-attributes="member: 17720"><p>I don't know, Echo. To me acceptance and detachment are hard to untangle from each other. I am not sure complete detachment is something any of us really aspire to, but it would be nice for me to have some underlying peace in the midst of the storms like the one you describe with your difficult child. Expectations and hope are also hard for me to untangle. When does no expectations become no hope? And like you said, when does it all become dishonest? We can't have any acceptance without an honest foundation, I think.</p><p></p><p>Years ago I had cancer. When I would go for my chemo treatments I would sit with some people who were afraid their time would soon be up and some who knew it would be up soon without a doubt. They were the most extraordinary people I've ever known. Detached is NOT a word that would apply to them. They were full of passion, authenticity and gratitude and somehow managed to find acceptance without resignation. </p><p></p><p>I am not sure how that applies to our difficult children. In a way I feel sometimes like I'm fighting a disease like cancer when it comes to difficult child's bad choices, because as another poster once said, he is part of me. He is in my soul and in my DNA. There is something *not right* at the cellular level. What does it feel like, look like, to accept that?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Albatross, post: 626046, member: 17720"] I don't know, Echo. To me acceptance and detachment are hard to untangle from each other. I am not sure complete detachment is something any of us really aspire to, but it would be nice for me to have some underlying peace in the midst of the storms like the one you describe with your difficult child. Expectations and hope are also hard for me to untangle. When does no expectations become no hope? And like you said, when does it all become dishonest? We can't have any acceptance without an honest foundation, I think. Years ago I had cancer. When I would go for my chemo treatments I would sit with some people who were afraid their time would soon be up and some who knew it would be up soon without a doubt. They were the most extraordinary people I've ever known. Detached is NOT a word that would apply to them. They were full of passion, authenticity and gratitude and somehow managed to find acceptance without resignation. I am not sure how that applies to our difficult children. In a way I feel sometimes like I'm fighting a disease like cancer when it comes to difficult child's bad choices, because as another poster once said, he is part of me. He is in my soul and in my DNA. There is something *not right* at the cellular level. What does it feel like, look like, to accept that? [/QUOTE]
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I'd like to talk about acceptance
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