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Parent Emeritus
If I thought 35 could be trying before, it's going to be 100% worse now...
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 589828" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>that ex has sued for sole custody. He calls me about ten times a day. Well, sometimes he calls me ten times in a row if I'm talking to somebody else and can't answer or just don't want to talk. Then I pick up because it drives everyone else nuts. Or I turn off the phone and nobody else can contact me. And nothing I do or say stops the non-stop calls. He is totally freaked out that his ex is going for sole custody, even though she is unlikely to get it. He is incapable, even at 35, of letting go of a fear or a thought or a worry and can't have a break and a good time while something stressful is going on.</p><p></p><p>35 is a good dad and his son is his world. He'll say so over and over again if you ask him and he means it. He has nobody else in Missouri and is crazy about his son. And J. is crazy about him, like any little kid who gets uninterrupted attention from his parent is. But this is something out of his control and he really needs to make friends or find a girlfriend and stop relying on me. When I'm on the phone, the other people in my family who live here walk by and roll their eyes...my husband, Jumper, even Sonic shakes his head. </p><p></p><p>If she actually gets custody, I'm leaving the country. It's possible she could, even though she is much crazier than he is and a total loose cannon. If the judge thinks the two of them are unable to co-parent, and ex deliberately makes that impossible, he could conceivably decide one or other should get sole custody and it may be her. I'm tired of living my son's divorce. He picked this ditz. Everyone told him she was not good wife material, but did he listen? Do they ever? </p><p></p><p>When things are calm, me and 35 get along.</p><p>. He has my rather sick and twisted sense of humor and we really have fun. But...when he is under stress he is so negative and difficult and obsessed on the stressor I just want him to leave me alone. I feel bad enough about what grandson is going through without being reminded of it every two hours. I have a lot of activities now and he gets annoyed when I shut off my phone to do them.</p><p></p><p>Anyhow this is just a vent at my annoyance. 35 needs a life. He needs guy friends to do stuff with. He needs a girlfriend, but can't seem to keep one. Honestly, I was hoping he'd scrape together enough money to get a psychologist, but with having to pay his dad back for the lawyer he has now that will be impossible.</p><p></p><p>Well, time to increase my boundaries again. His stress is feeding me and I don't want it.</p><p></p><p>Vent over. Thanks for listening <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 589828, member: 1550"] that ex has sued for sole custody. He calls me about ten times a day. Well, sometimes he calls me ten times in a row if I'm talking to somebody else and can't answer or just don't want to talk. Then I pick up because it drives everyone else nuts. Or I turn off the phone and nobody else can contact me. And nothing I do or say stops the non-stop calls. He is totally freaked out that his ex is going for sole custody, even though she is unlikely to get it. He is incapable, even at 35, of letting go of a fear or a thought or a worry and can't have a break and a good time while something stressful is going on. 35 is a good dad and his son is his world. He'll say so over and over again if you ask him and he means it. He has nobody else in Missouri and is crazy about his son. And J. is crazy about him, like any little kid who gets uninterrupted attention from his parent is. But this is something out of his control and he really needs to make friends or find a girlfriend and stop relying on me. When I'm on the phone, the other people in my family who live here walk by and roll their eyes...my husband, Jumper, even Sonic shakes his head. If she actually gets custody, I'm leaving the country. It's possible she could, even though she is much crazier than he is and a total loose cannon. If the judge thinks the two of them are unable to co-parent, and ex deliberately makes that impossible, he could conceivably decide one or other should get sole custody and it may be her. I'm tired of living my son's divorce. He picked this ditz. Everyone told him she was not good wife material, but did he listen? Do they ever? When things are calm, me and 35 get along. . He has my rather sick and twisted sense of humor and we really have fun. But...when he is under stress he is so negative and difficult and obsessed on the stressor I just want him to leave me alone. I feel bad enough about what grandson is going through without being reminded of it every two hours. I have a lot of activities now and he gets annoyed when I shut off my phone to do them. Anyhow this is just a vent at my annoyance. 35 needs a life. He needs guy friends to do stuff with. He needs a girlfriend, but can't seem to keep one. Honestly, I was hoping he'd scrape together enough money to get a psychologist, but with having to pay his dad back for the lawyer he has now that will be impossible. Well, time to increase my boundaries again. His stress is feeding me and I don't want it. Vent over. Thanks for listening :) [/QUOTE]
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If I thought 35 could be trying before, it's going to be 100% worse now...
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