.....this is your future: They will NEVER grow up. There is this couple in our neighborhood who are in their 80's. The wife is not in good health. Their 60 YEAR OLD alcoholic loser of a son has lived with them since he was divorced, probably almost 20 years now. He also has his 28 year old drug addict daughter and her little girl living there too. The daughter has also had several live in boyfriends there as well over the years. From time to time I see this 80 something year old man driving his 60 year old son around. The son got a DWI last year and lost his license. The cops are at the house quite often, most recently while I was out walking the dog I saw the cops putting the 60 year old into the back of a car in handcuffs. A couple of years ago the 28 year old and her then live in boyfriend threw a huge 4th of July party. A few days later we saw the brother of the 60 year old and we stopped to talk to him. He said that the "kids" and all their friends trashed the house during the July 4th party. I remember being out working in the yard one time and hearing the 60 year old yelling at his elderly father. I would not be surprised one bit if there is abuse going on in that household. It is a very sad, sad situation, but ultimately one that parents of adult children choose to allow to happen. I have also seen it in my own family. My alcoholic and drug addicted uncle sponged off of/robbed blind my poor grandparents until the day they died. In fact, when he was in his 50's he was living with them in their assisted living community until they died. When my grandfather retired and my grandparents moved to Florida, they gave him their house free and clear. When my uncle got in an argument with someone and later got drunk and went back to that persons house with a shotgun, my grandparents paid his bail and paid for his lawyer. They also bailed him out for multiple DUIs. When he got divorced he wanted to move to Florida. My grandparents bought him a house! They bought him cars and gave him money. What they didn't give him, he stole, especially as they got old and senility and dementia kicked in. My grandparents died broke. Thier loser of a son literally bled them dry. When my grandfather died, all my uncle seemed to care about was if there was a will and how much money he would get. My mother is a smart woman, she told him where he could go. No one has heard from my uncle since, and this was nearly 20 years ago. Having seen this play out first hand I believe had a good deal with me having an easier time of detaching and being able to detach so completely from our son. I don't want to be that elderly man who has his 50 or 60 something drug addict kid beating him and stealing his money. I simply won't allow it to happen. At 31 years old, he can either choose to succeed or fail, but whatever he chooses, it's all on him.