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The Watercooler
If you have raised/are raising a daughter - HELP!
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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 381526" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Can't she do group activities? At that age, she can easily be chaperoned because she can't drive. That way you make sure there really is a group.</p><p>My daughter had the opposite problem--guys would ask her out and she thought they were all nerds. I told her that she wasn't old enough to date anyway, so what was the issue? Just tell the truth. Oh, okay. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite2" alt=";)" title="Wink ;)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=";)" /></p><p>I would sit her down and have a family mtng. Tell her that now she's a young adult, is expected to take on more chores and responsibilities. Being grown up means you get to do more things, but you also have more responsiblities.</p><p>Do not do it when she is running out the door. Set up a real meeting time. Listen to her vent, but don't let her take control.</p><p>One thing we do to keep control and format family mtngs is choose an object, like a dried flower or even a fork, and each person holds it to signify it is their turn. When they are finished talking, they give it to the next person. (I think it's a Native Am ritual but I'm not sure.) They are supposed to stick to "I" statements and not throw out insults. IOW, she could say, "I feel like I am being treated unfairly because I know I'm old enough to do this."</p><p>The you take the object and say, "What would you use as your basis for judging yourself?" and then give the object back to her so she can talk.</p><p>Best of luck. This is a hard age.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 381526, member: 3419"] Can't she do group activities? At that age, she can easily be chaperoned because she can't drive. That way you make sure there really is a group. My daughter had the opposite problem--guys would ask her out and she thought they were all nerds. I told her that she wasn't old enough to date anyway, so what was the issue? Just tell the truth. Oh, okay. ;) I would sit her down and have a family mtng. Tell her that now she's a young adult, is expected to take on more chores and responsibilities. Being grown up means you get to do more things, but you also have more responsiblities. Do not do it when she is running out the door. Set up a real meeting time. Listen to her vent, but don't let her take control. One thing we do to keep control and format family mtngs is choose an object, like a dried flower or even a fork, and each person holds it to signify it is their turn. When they are finished talking, they give it to the next person. (I think it's a Native Am ritual but I'm not sure.) They are supposed to stick to "I" statements and not throw out insults. IOW, she could say, "I feel like I am being treated unfairly because I know I'm old enough to do this." The you take the object and say, "What would you use as your basis for judging yourself?" and then give the object back to her so she can talk. Best of luck. This is a hard age. [/QUOTE]
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