I'm am SOOOO MAD, I've gone postal on .....

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Hanging-On, Nov 7, 2007.

  1. Hanging-On

    Hanging-On New Member

    MD's, BMS provider, Home Base provider, and both kids.

    Both difficult child and easy child had their 'required' annual this morning. The BMS, Home base therapist, and psychiatric office required it, so I complied (once again). First the boys did everything to sabotage this morning and we got to the pediatrician's late. Then the front desk person and nurse kept asking for their shot records, for their medication records, for ALL the F'g forms I had filled out and signed before. ALL of that was missing out of their files.........ALL. Then difficult child and easy child were completely out of control while we were there with the pediatrician (for 2 hours). COMPLETELY. All of the following in the exam room with the pediatrician there trying to talk to me, and exam the 2 of them: running around playing chase and tag, standing of the exam table and jumping off, standing on chairs, jumping for the mobile hanging from the ceiling, swimming across the floor, crawling into the space under the table, throwing magazines and books at each other, screaming and laughing uncontrollably, tearing up magazines, hitting kicking shoving each other, cussing, telling me off when I tell them the consquences of their actions once they hit #3 again & again & again, tearing up the paper on the table, playing with the pediatrician's computer, and then when I put one kid on a chair the other one jumps off the table and stands behind me and tries to hit or tag the other, so I then take that kid and put him in the corner and the other one gets up to tag the other, so I pick up that kid and put in on the table and the other one leaves the corner to tag the other, so I put that kid on the chair and the other one jumps off the table to tag the other. THIS WENT ON FOR 2 F'G HOURS, and the pediatrician just watched calm as can be. The two of them went through 1,2,3 = consequence every second!!!!!!!!!!! SO THEY ARE GROUNDED TODAY AND TONIGHT!!!! I called the BMS and Home Base therapist to tell them that tonighg the boys will NOT be joining us in the visit. I told both schools, and babysitter and BMS person that they are NOT allowed to watch TV, play with toys, play with kids, go outside, etc........THEY ARE GROUNDED, and I don't give a flying flip if someone disagrees with me. THey both had a hundred warnings and chances to get under control so that pediatrician could examine them and then talk to me. I spent all that time being tag teamed and I have no idea what the pediatrician said,..NONE! He did say and I was like 'ARE YOU KIDDING ME", he said that this behavior that he was watching was NORMAL age behavior for boys. Boys are active, hyper etc. And that they are growing boys. I told him that I remember boys who could at sit and wait quietly when their mother told them too. These two laughed at me, cussed at me, telling me I'm a jerk and that they hate me when ever they received another consquence. I"M AM SO :censored2: RIGHT NOW I COULD THROW SOMETHING.

    I also went off on the Home base provider/case worker because difficult child had ANOTHER bad report from the BMS person yesterday, and I told her that I didn't think this provided was working. difficult child had much better results with easy child's preschool/babysitter lady, etc, etc. etc.

    I also told them that I'm tired of having to discuss and ask the same thing over and over and over again. I told her if you want me to go postal then one thing you do is make me rehash the same :censored2: over and over again with no resolution what so ever. I am the type of person who puts it on the list, research it, discuss, and work on it, and resolve it.....Period!!! But for months now I have been going over the same stuff, and asking the same questions with no answers coming back.

    I also went off on them becuase I'm tired of difficult child and easy child coming home with sugar stuff. I have told EVERYONE, that my kids are not allowed sugar and dye...period. I have changed our eating. I bake our own bread, I make our own yogart, I cook from scratch, and then to have them come home with something from the cooking class that's sugary are something processed I'm like getting really :censored2:. I finally told someone that the next time they are given sugar then THAT person will be left with them to deal with the craziness that it produces!!! They just looked at me.

    OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO I'm so mad and just want to pummel something.

    That's for the vent.
     
  2. prayerful

    prayerful New Member

    i understand i am having one of those days also . I tell the school to not give my son candy they do it anyway. I tell them to send me a behavior report daily they do it every other day! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!now when he is out of control and has one million outburst i have to handle it then it's my promblem!

    I am so upset today that i just want to run and never come back , but my husband hurt his back so i am stuck here he can't hardly move to go to the bathroom without crying :sad: i just want to scream i might loose my voice .


    trying to calm down need a glass of red wine :smile:
     
  3. Anna1345

    Anna1345 New Member

    {{{HUGS}}}} Hang in there! I know you just want to SCREAM!!!! Maybe you should! Even hit some pillows! It will make you feel better!

    Oh and HOW can that pediatrician think this is normal behavior??? Does he NOT have kids? The nerve. Maybe he was trying to make you feel better?
     
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    I hear you! I have the same issues with-foods. It's really, really hard. Nobody gets it. We have one mom who will make sure difficult child doesn't get any wheat or milk products, but she's the only one. I love her!
    So sorry about filling out all the forms, and the fact that they were all missing ... again! I'm learning to make copies. Many, many copies. I don't trust anybody to do their jobs any more. If they do, it makes my day!
    I hope you have a calmer evening.
     
  5. Hanging-On

    Hanging-On New Member

    Just got back from a 3 hour meeting with BMS. I had calmed down enough to put everything out on the table. Plus the new director came into our meeting, and he was AWESOME. He could relate, answer things in a way I understood, didn't drag out his sentences (like some of our therapist-which drives me crazy, I just want to pull out the point from their mouth.....ahhh). So thanks to him we got alot accomplished. The one thing that I almost rolled my eyes on was the fact that the 4.5hrs per week day difficult child is there with his BMS he is NOT on a routine????????? WHAT???

    Routine has been driven down my throat for years, and THEY aren't even following that? So I told them to make a routine in 15-30 minute time slots so that difficult child knows exactly what is going to happen 2 steps from this point. AND to build in contingency steps just in case the tv is broken, it's raining outside, etc. so that he knows if this doesn't happen, then that will.

    OMG, I mean, why am "I" telling THEM how to structure his day?????? No wonder he's having a hard time there. Geesh.

    Well the new director was right with me and agreeing, and telling them to do what I'm telling them to do. He's also telling them that if difficult child is spinning, then the BMS provider has missed the trigger because difficult child is already self-regulating. (WHAT an EYE-OPENER for me). In that one sentence I understood a world of stuff.......why hasn't anyone else talked to me like that??? So I really pushed the issue. I think I will also make a point to have more conversations with this man, because in no time at all I understand something, and was calming down the second he came in. HUGE difference between trying to talk to these 20 something recent college grads who are going by the book.

    Well tonight is homebase services and I already told them that the boys are grounded, so they will not be participating. So they can come or not, it's up to them.
     
  6. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    :grrr: :nonono: :devil:
    Oh, I feel your pain...................I have so been there.

    I am so sorry. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
    Hang in there.......and keep fighting the good fight.
     
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