What follows is a copy of an email I sent to a social worker (S) here that is associated with the school system. She doesn't officially work with difficult child anymore, especially since he's cancelled all of his services since he turned 18, but she and I have been in touch lately. Logically, I can sit and say that yes, when the situation gets to point X, this is what we will have to do. Realistically, I'm having some problems. I just got off the phone with a nice young man from the ***** Center. He was difficult child's "classroom aide" last year and again this year. difficult child has cancelled that service and will be soon severing all ties with the ***** Center. As of a week or so ago, he was only passing 2 classes out of 6 or 7, he's being very disrespectful and disruptive, non compliant, isn't taking his medications like he should, has had a few referrals, Friday schools and suspensions and is generally being awful. According to the guy I talked to tonight, he's also getting somewhat aggressive, I'm sure, because he's not taking his medications correctly. At school. At home.......not horrible but not good either. He's broken just about every main rule in our house, has a serious "I'm 18 and can do what I want" attitude and shows little to no respect for Brian and I, our home and our rules/expectations. We have turned over the responsibility of taking his medications to him and we could, once again, stand there and watch him take it. But, if he doesn't want to, we literally can not force him to take his pills. We (everyone on the "team" within the past couple of years) have discussed being forced to kick difficult child out of the house and as much as I talked a good game, I'm having difficulty. I think we're very close to resorting to this and I don't know what to do. Yes, he's working and doing well at it. That is the ONLY thing he is doing well with right now. I think. ****NOT IN THE EMAIL: He is working but at the moment isn't making enough to support himself. Plus, he blows literally every last cent he earns**** But...everything else is going downhill fast. If he quits or is expelled from school, all of his insurance stops which means no more medications. If he has no more medications, he will NOT be living here. He gets entirely too volatile without the right medications and we can't have an unstable person in our home. Not one that refuses to do anything to help himself anyway. I don't know if you still run into him at school but once he officially terminates the ***** Center, he will have cancelled EVERYTHING he had previously been associated with. He quit counseling almost the minute he turned 18 and the only person he still sees is the psychiatrist who prescribes his medications. How do you put someone on the street with no medications and no place to go? I know we've all told him what he needs to do and we all agree we can't help him if he won't help himself. I have no problem with that concept. But how do I put him on the street and tell him he can no longer live here? Not only is it putting my child on the street with winter here but I'm also putting a possibly unmedicated person who is very unpredictable without his medications, out into a society of unspecting people. I look at this scenario and knowing how resistant he is to help, the best outcome I can see is that he winds up in jail. At least there he has a warm cot, a roof over his head and food in his stomach. The only other solution would be to send him to **city of origin** to his bio family. However, his grandmother would expect the same things from him that we do and I don't know that he would comply. I don't want to put her in that position. She's already dealt with enough raising his older brother. His bio mom, while not the best person for him to live with, is, I believe, in jail. I'm not sure but either way, she's in no position to be of any real help either. Any family of mine or husband's is either not equipped to handle him either or not willing. I wouldn't ask that of them anyway. The only thing I know at this point is that things are coming to a head and can't continue like this for much longer. It's too toxic. But how do I put my child out on the street? Especially this time of year? husband and I have had many talks over the years. He is so hurt and bewildered that we weren't able to "fix" difficult child. While I lost my optimism on "fixing" him fairly early on, I had hoped that things would have turned out at least a little better than they have. I had hoped that we would have been able to instill SOME sort of ....I don't know what...something in him. I'm at a loss, S. If things continue the way they are going (and history proves they probably will), how do we do what will need to be done? I've seen posts like this time and time again since I've joined this board and have put more than my 2 cents in. Logically and objectively it's easy to say. Now that I'm speeding towards that scenario myself, I'm second guessing everything. No, he's not perfect around here but he's not screaming at us or threatening us either. He hasn't gotten violent, he's not doing drugs/alcohol, he's not doing this or that. But at the same time, it IS coming to a head. He refuses any service that would help him because they all expect him to basically do things that are beyond what he wants to do or thinks he should have to do. We can sit difficult child down and in a civil, calm, matter of fact manner, tell him that if things continue in this way, X, Y and Z will happen. We've done it before. He NEVER believes us. Or, if he agrees and we all discuss ways of improving/working together/compromising/whatever, he does not follow through and then gets upset when he is expected to. When the consequence finally does happen, his response EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. is "I didn't think you were serious!" I just don't know what to do. The only thing I DO know is that none of us can continue like this for much longer. The school won't put up with him acting like this and I'm reeeeally close to the frayed ends of my rope. I am in desperate need of a huge fruity drink, a warm sandy beach and either a Raoul or a Claudio.