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I'm back to square 1 aka hw much "I'm bored" is to much
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 430774" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>I think it varies a whole lot from kid to kid. What does she do when you do not give her ideas? I can remember as a child that it was NOT a good thing to tell my parents I was bored. It often resulted in being told that only boring minds get bored. I HATED hearing that. Even more likely was being given something to do. Usually it was NOT optional esp if we complained of boredom several times. The something to do was always a chore. </p><p></p><p>I have noticed that many of my children's peers have absolutely no idea what to do when they are left to their own devices with-o an electronic screen (tv, computer, video game, etc....).. One of my son's friends would actually go and watch the microwave if his mother turned off the screens and was using it. Part of the problem is that they haven't ever been left alone to solve the problem themselves. If they have been left alone to figure out what to do and they choose something that causes damage or a big mess then the parents feel partly at fault somehow for not entertaining them. After all, they told them to go find something to do, didn't they? They didn't set limits or say to not do whatever it was. At first I thought it was just one parent's insanity, but then I realized that many of my son's peers had parents who operated that way. Not only did they blame themselves, the parents cleaned up after the child with little if any help from the child!! </p><p></p><p>The other problem I saw was that so many of my kids' classmates were activitied to within an inch of their lives. Every afternoon had some after school program or sport, usually after daycare or the babysitter. If it wasn't for that child it was for a sibling. If I had a dime for every time a parent could not believe that I made my child choose just one after school activity I would be independently wealthy right now. Three of my daughter's friends were actually taken out of school an hour or more per week for a lesson of some kind - music, foreign language, dance or something else. One year the teachers actually changed the times they taught core classes because eight of the children in one classroom missed part of a day each week for some lesson!! These kids were busy from before seven am to at least nine pm from second or third grade on. Summers had to be packed full of things because the kids were not ABLE to stay home all day without something scheduled to do with a group. Then the parents would complain about how much driving around they did, the cost of all these activities, and how their kids could not occupy themselves and even how they didn't use their imaginations!! When did they have time to learn to be imaginative?? Or to keep themselves occupied??</p><p></p><p>Those are skills like anything else. They can be learned. I realize that you did NOT create this problem in your daughter and I am NOT blaming you. I am stating the reasons I have seen for boredom in my children's peers. </p><p></p><p>Is she seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist? I assume that her medications are rx'd by a psychiatrist. What does the doctor say about this boredom? What strategies has the therapist suggested to help her solve the boredom? If she doesn't have a therapist, it would be very helpful for her to see one regularly. The best treatment for depression is a combination of medication and therapy according to the research my psychiatrist has shared in the past.</p><p></p><p>I hope some of this helps. It is really hard to see your child so depressed.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 430774, member: 1233"] I think it varies a whole lot from kid to kid. What does she do when you do not give her ideas? I can remember as a child that it was NOT a good thing to tell my parents I was bored. It often resulted in being told that only boring minds get bored. I HATED hearing that. Even more likely was being given something to do. Usually it was NOT optional esp if we complained of boredom several times. The something to do was always a chore. I have noticed that many of my children's peers have absolutely no idea what to do when they are left to their own devices with-o an electronic screen (tv, computer, video game, etc....).. One of my son's friends would actually go and watch the microwave if his mother turned off the screens and was using it. Part of the problem is that they haven't ever been left alone to solve the problem themselves. If they have been left alone to figure out what to do and they choose something that causes damage or a big mess then the parents feel partly at fault somehow for not entertaining them. After all, they told them to go find something to do, didn't they? They didn't set limits or say to not do whatever it was. At first I thought it was just one parent's insanity, but then I realized that many of my son's peers had parents who operated that way. Not only did they blame themselves, the parents cleaned up after the child with little if any help from the child!! The other problem I saw was that so many of my kids' classmates were activitied to within an inch of their lives. Every afternoon had some after school program or sport, usually after daycare or the babysitter. If it wasn't for that child it was for a sibling. If I had a dime for every time a parent could not believe that I made my child choose just one after school activity I would be independently wealthy right now. Three of my daughter's friends were actually taken out of school an hour or more per week for a lesson of some kind - music, foreign language, dance or something else. One year the teachers actually changed the times they taught core classes because eight of the children in one classroom missed part of a day each week for some lesson!! These kids were busy from before seven am to at least nine pm from second or third grade on. Summers had to be packed full of things because the kids were not ABLE to stay home all day without something scheduled to do with a group. Then the parents would complain about how much driving around they did, the cost of all these activities, and how their kids could not occupy themselves and even how they didn't use their imaginations!! When did they have time to learn to be imaginative?? Or to keep themselves occupied?? Those are skills like anything else. They can be learned. I realize that you did NOT create this problem in your daughter and I am NOT blaming you. I am stating the reasons I have seen for boredom in my children's peers. Is she seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist? I assume that her medications are rx'd by a psychiatrist. What does the doctor say about this boredom? What strategies has the therapist suggested to help her solve the boredom? If she doesn't have a therapist, it would be very helpful for her to see one regularly. The best treatment for depression is a combination of medication and therapy according to the research my psychiatrist has shared in the past. I hope some of this helps. It is really hard to see your child so depressed. [/QUOTE]
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