I'm fine....sorry

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by buddy, Jan 10, 2013.

  1. buddy

    buddy New Member

    My computer was left on but I wasn't actually reading anything because I got some kind of bug....stomach and headache, so every time I tried to read I got nauseous. Sorry, guys....but I feel much better now, just was worn out yesterday and yet had to do the normal being a mom stuff....so no time to post.

    Had a couple of issues with school....not Q's issues, just paperwork and stuff. They had Q call me to ask that I send an ROI back and if he brought it he could get a treat at their coffee house. Well, problem with that is I dont use him to transport papers because they could get lost, or ripped or whatever....and especially if a legal document.

    THey knew that, of course. But that made him obsess that he wouldn't get to go to the student coffee house and so he bullied me etc. I agreed to let him take the paper and never argued with him about it but did send a blank paper and handed them the actual ROI. It felt weird because it was like I didn't have a right to choose to sign the ROI. I did want to sign this one but what if it was something I didn't want to sign?

    They needed it because they couldnt' find one (I had already signed this one...for my advocate) and they had written a response saying why we were not doing the independent evaluation, but still doing an evaluation using their person. Turns out they had their lawyer write that. Seems like overkill to me and those kinds of things all add up to distrust, like they are being so careful to gather things together. I don't know, it felt funny and I didn't like Q being put in the middle of adult matters.

    So, I wrote to them again reminding them that any IEP business needs to be directed to me, and he can't even overhear it. Having him call and demand I send it with him was not cool.

    AS for his birthday??? It made me feel much better. It went so well I was able to let go of any sadness I had about his being so delayed/disabled....and focused instead on how far we have come just this year. Last year at this time we had a dinner and he was blurty and rude to me, and in the end shoved my mom and my sister withheld his birthday gift etc.

    This year, we went to this HUGE Asian buffet/hibachi, sushi bar place.....it was really fresh and good. Q has wanted to go there (on his list of buildings and restaurants he keeps....lol) since we moved here. Everyone loved it. My three sisters and mom came, one sister's boyfriend and a niece and nephew also came. They were all like, OMG, this year is so different. He got gifts and the restaurant made this cool sculptured fruit plate for him with a candle! He requested we not sing and everyone said fine. He opened amazing gifts and showed appreciation even for the cards. Lots of hugs and sweet talk all around. It was lovely.

    The providers that started with us about the time Q took the medication that he reacted to and have only known him since we went into crisis mode....are now getting to see why I was so resistant to his going to a residential placement etc. They are seeing the fun side, the potential he has etc.

    He just got his second pay from his school job and he was sooooo proud. He is using his phone totally appropriately. Everyone is shocked about that. he is even setting a morning alarm ...as well as alarms for when Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) people start and stop etc. Pretty impressive actually.

    He is Q, that wont change (had an ugly morning, but not over the top thank heaven...well to me, I imagine if anyone else saw him they would have been shocked at his words and behaviors)....but it is short stuff, generally does not go over the top (if so, it is once a month versus multiple times per day and no actual bruise types of behaviors for a long time...QUICK KNOCK WOOD).

    Having these great times and super reports from his therapies and social groups and Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) sessions....makes all those times bearable.

    Yipee....
     
  2. TeDo

    TeDo Guest

    I am so happy you are feeling better. I missed you. Thanks for updating everyone and letting me know you're still alive. Yeah Q!! I am still sooooo impressed with how far he has come. We sure are in a different place and I am grateful for every day of it.
     
  3. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Awwwwwww such good news I remember your post about his birthday last year. He has come so far! Glad he is no longer bruising you. Hope that behavior has stopped for good. BI outcomes are unpredictable and since his was at such a young age it is possible it is still mending. Or he could just be learning to use different pathways. Either way he has shown that he can learn better behavior and that is huge.

    So glad you are feeling better. A moms job never ends but glad you were able to get a little rest. -RM
     
  4. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Nice to see you!

    Eww, so sorry you were sick. Feel better! It's hard to recover quickly and completely with-kids like ours; we're always on call.

    I love this: "AS for his birthday??? It made me feel much better. It went so well I was able to let go of any sadness I had about his being so delayed/disabled....and focused instead on how far we have come just this year. Last year at this time we had a dinner and he was blurty and rude to me, and in the end shoved my mom and my sister withheld his birthday gift etc."


    So true, and so constructive. I am trying to think in those terms with-my difficult child. :)
     
  5. Tiapet

    Tiapet Old Hand

    I'm sorry you weren't feeling well. But you know, you ARE allowed to get sick lol, not that you "wanted" to!

    I'm so happy Q had such a really nice birthday and that it went so well and others could enjoy the GOOD things with you too. It's nice to share good stuff and not all the crummy stuff with them. Such and inspiring post. I hope many read it and can see that it really does pay to stick it out and fight for our kids. It's not easy, geesh don't we know it, but it can be worth it! ;)
     
  6. Nancy

    Nancy Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm glad you're feeling better buddy!
     
  7. InsaneCdn

    InsaneCdn Well-Known Member

    No you were NOT fine... we just about had to get a circle of support going for you. And would have if you hadn't turned up alive and well today... ;)
     
  8. SuZir

    SuZir Well-Known Member

    :hugs: Sorry you have been sick. Flus and even common colds seem to be especially nasty this year. Happy you are feeling a bit better. Try to take good care of yourself, okay?

    I'm so glad you had a good birthday party for Q. He (and you) really deserved that. And the progress he has made, just WOW! Very proud of you two.
     
  9. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    You are my hero. I LOVE that his birthday was wonderful and that he is in a good place. It is because you have never faltered, even when you have hit a wall. KUDOS to you both.
     
  10. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    I'm so glad Q had a great birthday and was well behaved; sorry you weren't feeling well recently. You are a saint and a rock and a regular person all rolled into one. :hapydancsmil:
     
  11. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I'm glad you updated us and are feeling better. You know we're a bunch of mother hen types and we worry. LOL

    So nice to hear the progress Q has made. He's growing up. Maybe not quite as fast as other kids, but still he's growing up at his own pace. :)
     
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