I'm new here....I need to ask your help in what to do.....

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by inohio, Apr 2, 2010.

  1. inohio

    inohio Guest

    I viewed this site years ago and of course got side traced by life as to ever joining in. But here's my story (I'll try)
    My daughter who will be turning 17 in a few months has been court ordered to a Residential Treatment faculity....against my better judgement, no not judgement in my heart, I didn't want to see her go. She's not always the bad kid that athorities make her out to be, she make bad choices. Well she of course has been in and out of juvenile court probably at least 20 times and has spent just as many tours at the juvenile detention center in our county. Those stays are from anywhere from 30 to 90 days at a time......Well this last time her probation officer decided that going to a treatment center would teach her some "life skills". It was sold to my husband and I as a great thing. So two weeks ago we (husband & I) actually accompanied the probation officer in taking her to this facuilty. I felt like I sold my sole to the devil. First week she called home a few times crying saying that she "can't do it" that next weekend we went to see her and she seemed better. Talked to her a few times this week and things started to seem better, but this place makes her look like Snow White compared to the other residents.
    Untill last night, center called at about midnight to tell me that there was a fire at the center, everyone was allright, fire was contained and she was fine.
    Today I recieved a call from her and she informed me that when the fire alarm went off and they were in the stairwell, fighting broke out and she was in the middle and was punched in the ribs by a male resident. She is just stunned, and this is a girl who is not a stranger to fights. I also spoke to her case manager, which was who's office my daughter was in and she suggested that we file a police report. Apparently the culprits in the situation (who started the fire and the fight) are all in custody.

    Here is my concern, since this was court ordered and the state is involved do we as her parents have any recourse to remove her from the center? Does pressing charges get anywhere? What about the state? Since they are involved, isn't it the states responsiblilty to protect her?

    I'm not sure if I explained everything here correct and if this is even the right place to discuss it. Maybe I should be on the phone to a lawyer, I dunno.

    Does anyone have any experience with this and can give me some guidance. If you do, I thank you.
  2. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator


    I would definitely consult a lawyer so you know your rights and your daughter's rights.

    Hang in there and keep posting. If there are situations we can help you with, we'll gladly weigh in.
  3. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    I agree. Get in touch with a lawyer asap and find out what your rights are and what you can do.

    Welcome to the board.

  4. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Welcome (back) to the board. I agree with the other two posters. Contacting an attorney seems your best bet.

  5. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Welcome (back) ! If your daughter is court ordered then you will need an attorney to help change her placement and deal with problems and/or abuse that is going on. If the case manager encouraged you to file a police report then I suggest you do so. Ideally the case mgr would know the system and how to get things done.

    You describe a lot of problems, as many as 20 trips before a judge and into juvenile detention centers. Has she ever been evaluated for mental illness, learning disorders, health problems, anything like that? What were the diagnoses the doctors have given her? Did she/does she have an IEP for her schooling? The Residential Treatment Center (RTC) is required to provide education, and I would think an IEP would be part of the program. IEP is Individualized Education Program and it is the document that says how her education should be monitored so that she can best learn.

    I hope you can find a good attorney to help, and that you stick around for support.