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I'm spiraling down into black hole
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<blockquote data-quote="Anxworrier" data-source="post: 551178" data-attributes="member: 15226"><p style="text-align: left">Thank you for response! You hit the nail on the head. Im cycling round in my head about the worst what ifs. What if I never can get him to acknowledge that he needs help. Will he runaway, will he fail school. Will I never get him thru high school. Will he get violent when he hits puberty. Will I ever feel happiness again. </p> <p style="text-align: left">Ithink the first step is to get me calmed down and I acknowledge that my require medications. </p> <p style="text-align: left"></p> <p style="text-align: left">little bit about me...45, married to great guy who is 47 who has add but won't take medications doesn't like them. He also has a temper I think. But we dont fight becausei do everything to avoid it. I will do everything around house myself rather than demand help from family cuz i cant handle the emotions of them complaining etc. I grew up with a difficult older sibling who caused my parents so much anxiety and heart ache. Checked herself into psychiatric wards, got elec shock, lost some memory and kept getting in trouble, stole from my parents, they called police on her. I was the perfect middle child. Perfectionist, got high grades, wanted to please parents, teachers, friends, never started anyproblems, shied away from confrontation. Super sensitive, non confrontational, watching myarents discipline sister made me physically sick. Got migraines starting at six and still have them. </p> <p style="text-align: left"></p> <p style="text-align: left">Am now feeling like I'm gonna shut down from the stress of dealing w sons issues. </p> <p style="text-align: left"></p> <p style="text-align: left">When son was five ish I thought he was explosive,inflexible ala dr Ross Greene. As he has aged I think its odd and maybe depression and anxiety and maybe learning problem? He does the bare minimum and is angered if you try to push him. But I am such a terrible weak door mat kind of mom that I can't handle the idea of forcing him to do anything regarding testing or counseling or medications. It's like I am afraid of him. But on the other hand he can be so sweet and cute and helpful when he senses i need it. He talks about when he plays baseball in college as if his oblivious to the fact that he may never get there. I've thought he is delayed in his executive function skills cuz his reactions are always our of proportion to the situation. Most feelings he has go to anger. Disappointment...anger. Frustration...anger. Gentle confrontation about school...anger. His tolerance threshold is very low.</p> <p style="text-align: left"></p> <p style="text-align: left">My daughter 16 is loving sweet not the best student only cuz doesn't try totally hard, occasional melt downs when overwhelmed with high school work but totally normal. No rages...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Anxworrier, post: 551178, member: 15226"] [LEFT]Thank you for response! You hit the nail on the head. Im cycling round in my head about the worst what ifs. What if I never can get him to acknowledge that he needs help. Will he runaway, will he fail school. Will I never get him thru high school. Will he get violent when he hits puberty. Will I ever feel happiness again. Ithink the first step is to get me calmed down and I acknowledge that my require medications. little bit about me...45, married to great guy who is 47 who has add but won't take medications doesn't like them. He also has a temper I think. But we dont fight becausei do everything to avoid it. I will do everything around house myself rather than demand help from family cuz i cant handle the emotions of them complaining etc. I grew up with a difficult older sibling who caused my parents so much anxiety and heart ache. Checked herself into psychiatric wards, got elec shock, lost some memory and kept getting in trouble, stole from my parents, they called police on her. I was the perfect middle child. Perfectionist, got high grades, wanted to please parents, teachers, friends, never started anyproblems, shied away from confrontation. Super sensitive, non confrontational, watching myarents discipline sister made me physically sick. Got migraines starting at six and still have them. Am now feeling like I'm gonna shut down from the stress of dealing w sons issues. When son was five ish I thought he was explosive,inflexible ala dr Ross Greene. As he has aged I think its odd and maybe depression and anxiety and maybe learning problem? He does the bare minimum and is angered if you try to push him. But I am such a terrible weak door mat kind of mom that I can't handle the idea of forcing him to do anything regarding testing or counseling or medications. It's like I am afraid of him. But on the other hand he can be so sweet and cute and helpful when he senses i need it. He talks about when he plays baseball in college as if his oblivious to the fact that he may never get there. I've thought he is delayed in his executive function skills cuz his reactions are always our of proportion to the situation. Most feelings he has go to anger. Disappointment...anger. Frustration...anger. Gentle confrontation about school...anger. His tolerance threshold is very low. My daughter 16 is loving sweet not the best student only cuz doesn't try totally hard, occasional melt downs when overwhelmed with high school work but totally normal. No rages...[/LEFT] [/QUOTE]
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