papadoodle
New Member
My child is 4 years old and he starting to worry me. We live in France. I am English my wife is French. He also has a little sister of 18 months.
Most of the time he is good as gold. Polite, helpful. But when he “turns” he can be a real terror.
We me he is generally good. I’m quite strict when the need arises.
However he doesn’t really pay much attention to his mother’s authority and none at all to the schools / child minders.
Some of his “symptoms”:-
Sulking over nothing
Crying (really screaming) over very little for extended periods of time (45 minutes to an hour at school)
He Panics if we do something in his place.. eg..
His mother may say to him “zip your coat up” a couple of minutes later he still hasn’t done it so she will say it again.. no result so she leans in to zip it up herself and he scream “aaarrrggghh its me who has to do it just me !!!!” etc
p.s his hearing is fine.
Another eg
The school went for a trip to the school yesterday. All week he was excited about it and “seeing the giraffes” he kept talking about how the giraffe would give him a kiss and how he would bring one home and how it would get all the apples off the tree and give them to the children (he really can be adorable)
Sadly the visit to the zoo didn’t start with the giraffes, they were about half way round… a screaming nightmare ensued..
This is his first year at preschool and they just cant handle him. During a meeting with his teachers The head teacher told us “in all my career i have never had a child like him!”
I have started a “behaviour board” but it is just getting out of hand. Nearly everyday there is an incident at school where he kicks a teacher of screams for an hour.
What bugs me the most is that I don’t want to punish him. I don’t want the teacher to single him out as a “bad kid” or “disruptive child” I want to figure out a way to teach him compassion and to realise how his behaviour affects other people and that acting up is going to make his day worse for him where as being the little angel he can be would make his whole day great.
Can anyone point me in the direction of, well, anything?
by the way we had a meeting with the school psyc and she says he’s great just rigid and said (and I agree with) that if he is bad at school the punishment should be there and then and not carried over to when he gets home.
I think its pointless to punish a four year old in the evening for something he did in the morning, I don’t believe they have the same concept of time as us. He would have half forgotten the “incident” and would have bad behaviour reinforced buy my punishing him for something that, for him, happened ages ago.
Like I said I’m looking for tried and tested ways to reinforce good behaviour..
Most of the time he is good as gold. Polite, helpful. But when he “turns” he can be a real terror.
We me he is generally good. I’m quite strict when the need arises.
However he doesn’t really pay much attention to his mother’s authority and none at all to the schools / child minders.
Some of his “symptoms”:-
Sulking over nothing
Crying (really screaming) over very little for extended periods of time (45 minutes to an hour at school)
He Panics if we do something in his place.. eg..
His mother may say to him “zip your coat up” a couple of minutes later he still hasn’t done it so she will say it again.. no result so she leans in to zip it up herself and he scream “aaarrrggghh its me who has to do it just me !!!!” etc
p.s his hearing is fine.
Another eg
The school went for a trip to the school yesterday. All week he was excited about it and “seeing the giraffes” he kept talking about how the giraffe would give him a kiss and how he would bring one home and how it would get all the apples off the tree and give them to the children (he really can be adorable)
Sadly the visit to the zoo didn’t start with the giraffes, they were about half way round… a screaming nightmare ensued..
This is his first year at preschool and they just cant handle him. During a meeting with his teachers The head teacher told us “in all my career i have never had a child like him!”
I have started a “behaviour board” but it is just getting out of hand. Nearly everyday there is an incident at school where he kicks a teacher of screams for an hour.
What bugs me the most is that I don’t want to punish him. I don’t want the teacher to single him out as a “bad kid” or “disruptive child” I want to figure out a way to teach him compassion and to realise how his behaviour affects other people and that acting up is going to make his day worse for him where as being the little angel he can be would make his whole day great.
Can anyone point me in the direction of, well, anything?
by the way we had a meeting with the school psyc and she says he’s great just rigid and said (and I agree with) that if he is bad at school the punishment should be there and then and not carried over to when he gets home.
I think its pointless to punish a four year old in the evening for something he did in the morning, I don’t believe they have the same concept of time as us. He would have half forgotten the “incident” and would have bad behaviour reinforced buy my punishing him for something that, for him, happened ages ago.
Like I said I’m looking for tried and tested ways to reinforce good behaviour..