Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Lothlorien, Jul 18, 2008.
So, the in-home therapy is finally set up and she's coming today. What should I expect?
No idea, but curious to hear what others say. There have been MANY times I wish we had that kind of service!
I wish you a positive experience, mine was kinda so-so. The first wasn't really qualified and did little more then set up a strict behavior mod plan which caused alot of angst in my home, the second was really nice and seemed very capable but she was going thru her own family problems and had a less then 50 % attendance til our time ran out. At that time we where told we could continue with a case manager also getting involved with our family or go it alone again and seek outpatient tyreatment.
The first meeting seemed to go very well. I seem to gel with her. I got a very good feeling from her. We discussed the issues and came up with goals and made an appointment for next week. She is definitely not just an unqualified-just-out-of-college kid with no kids and just got her license which is kinda what you'd expect. She's quite the opposite.
I hope your instincts are right and this works for you and Missy.
I don't know much about in-home therapist- but according to what I read here, some people have good experiences but others aren't so good. We had to have the MST therapist (in-home) last year, until I requested a hearing in front of the judge to have the order removed. I learned from that experience that just because someone says they are a therapist, I can't assume that they are here to tailor fit their therapy to our needs and lives. I learned that MST is a behavior modification (contract) that requires EVERY aspect of the family's lives involved and everyone has to be a part of it (school, everyone). Anyway, that wasn't going to fly with me because no one (psychiatrist or tdocs) had said we needed this- the GAL assumed that MST / in-home therapy would provide whatever in-home therapuetic need was needed. It apparently doesn't work that way- but the guy wouldn't tell me that until I backed him into a corner.
So, to sum it up- I would just make sure that the therapist's goals are the same as yours and her means of getting to that goal are the same- or at least that you can discuss them and come to an agreement.
It sounds like so far, you've had a good experience. Mine wasn't so good, obviously- I felt mislead and like my and difficult child's lives were being taken over by someone who just thought some written agreement with difficult child would solve all the problems- at home and at school. Of course, difficult child and I would have been the ones to blame if (when) the contract didn't solve the problem.
Again, I have heard that there are other types of in-home therapy. I hope you are getting someone who is there to meet your needs and sincerely tries to do that. That kind of situation could be a wonderful thing!!
Glad to hear you have a good feeling about her. I think that we can often tell right away whether a doctor or therapist is going to work. Hope it stays positive and she offers the help you need.
We've had intensive in-home since last Oct til the middle of June. It never made a dint in son's problems. He would never engage/follow through. I've been dealing with his method of plactating, then not carrying out agreements for years and years, but I was willing to let them have a go. It seems they got no further with him than I did. It's like you can have the best therapist in the world, but if the kid isn't on board, the efficacy of the treatment is severly hampered.
The therapy helped me somewhat, and has given us more tools, but as far as making things better with my son? No.
Maybe they're more maleable when they're younger?
difficult child II has had his in home for over a year, we love her, she even brought an icecream cake to commerate their anniversary! She's been a God send to me and is committed to difficult child II and his progress, she gave birth in July and was back to us in 2 weeks time!
difficult child I had an in-home, that hardly ever was on time, would not call when he wasn't coming and never bothered to show up for his last two appts. he point blankly told me "difficult child I has an attitude problem"
So I got lucky for difficult child II, not so lucky with difficult child I and I am still waiting for a new inhome for him, because it was court ordered over a month ago, but DYFS is dragging their arse in setting it up.
I am feeling the pinch of paying utilities, bills and groceries on 20 hours a week and no child support coming in. So paying for private is not an option right now.
wishing you luck and hoping you get a "good one" :O)
Separate names with a comma.