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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 691877" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>I think pigless deciding to stand up for herself and her children, and for their rights to security and joy in their lives, is the thing that will transform the relationship with S.O. Each of us does need to take responsibility for choosing and holding on to and refusing to accept less than, a guiding imagery of how we want our lives to feel. </p><p></p><p>And when we are parents, of how we want our childrens' lives to feel, to them.</p><p></p><p>And it feels scary to demand more sometimes, but if we do not do that, we will compromise until we lose respect for one another, and lose the relationship altogether. </p><p></p><p>Remember that Tom Petty song about not living like a refugee, but that we have to fight to be free? It's very like that, I think.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>We have been using clumping litter, KTMom. <em>The litter box never has to be changed, again.</em> Someone (me) needs to scoop the litter box every day, but that is it. You just keep adding new litter. No odor, ever.</p><p></p><p>When D H complains about not being appreciated? I pretend I am playing a miniature air violin. Just with my fingers, like it is so tiny.</p><p></p><p>He hates that.</p><p></p><p>:O)</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 691877, member: 17461"] I think pigless deciding to stand up for herself and her children, and for their rights to security and joy in their lives, is the thing that will transform the relationship with S.O. Each of us does need to take responsibility for choosing and holding on to and refusing to accept less than, a guiding imagery of how we want our lives to feel. And when we are parents, of how we want our childrens' lives to feel, to them. And it feels scary to demand more sometimes, but if we do not do that, we will compromise until we lose respect for one another, and lose the relationship altogether. Remember that Tom Petty song about not living like a refugee, but that we have to fight to be free? It's very like that, I think. We have been using clumping litter, KTMom. [I]The litter box never has to be changed, again.[/I] Someone (me) needs to scoop the litter box every day, but that is it. You just keep adding new litter. No odor, ever. When D H complains about not being appreciated? I pretend I am playing a miniature air violin. Just with my fingers, like it is so tiny. He hates that. :O) Cedar [/QUOTE]
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