Indy Is gone...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by totoro, Jan 30, 2008.

  1. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I can barely breathe right now. I am just a sobbing mess. Our neighbor ran over Moose. husband had let Indy out to go potty and he was talking to our neighbor in front of our house, we guess she pulled out and drove away... running him over in the process.
    We were trying to deal with N and her friend who were fighting. We always let him out, we live on a dead end street every one has dogs... we look out for each other, with the kids and dogs...
    I guess not.
    I am just sick, I just laid in the snow sobbing... He was only 4 months old. I am angry at myself. Angry at her... I know it wasn't her fault, But I make comments about people slowing down all of the time...
    There is a huge pool of blood in the snow.
    I feel sick.
    My poor little man. I didn't even get my morning kiss...
    husband is a mess...
    How do we tell K???
    Please say a little wish for him, or what ever it is you do to help ease the pain and help one get through this loss...
    Thank you.
  2. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    OH, no... I'm so sorry to hear this. You must feel sick about it. (Try not to strangle the neighbor.) You'll have to tell K at some point- others might be able to give advice on that- I'm not sure what I would do- it would be tough.

  3. trinityroyal

    trinityroyal Well-Known Member

    Oh Toto, I'm so very sorry to hear this.
    Sending prayers for Indy, and for you to find the right words to tell K.

  4. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh goodness, that is awful. I went through this with my children a few years ago. Our dog got loose (we had him for five years) and the kids and I went out with the car and found Clebo crushed under rush hour traffic. It's tragic.

    I would try not and mention the who did it question at first. She is young and she might feel a strong sense of blame. It was an accident. You know your neighbor would take a "do over day" if she could.

    My heart goes out to you having to tell your daughter. It's not easy. Hugs, hugs, and more hugs.

  5. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh Im so sorry!

    This has happened to me more times than I care to remember. The last time when my neighbor killed my dogs I was such a mass of grief that I didnt think I would survive. I did.

    We also had our dog get killed when our boys were about your girls ages. It also happened when they were at school and I was so afraid of how to break it to them. I called their therapist and asked how. What we did was to direct about it, tell them that Gypsy had gone to "Doggy Heaven" now and was playing with (insert name of past pets), and that while we would always miss her someday she would see us again. Then we put up a little cross with her name on it. Needless to say over the years we have had this talk with numerous other pets and our family of fur friends waiting for us grows.

    Take your time. Be gentle with yourselves. This is a huge blow to take.

    Hugs sweetie.
  6. hearts and roses

    hearts and roses Mind Reader

    Sending gentle hugs. I hope you can find the words. I too would avoid the blame part. Oh this is just terrible.
  7. SRL

    SRL Active Member

    Oh, I'm soooooooooo very sorry--how your heart must be breaking right now.

    I know you are dealing with the grief right now and it's hard to think past that but ask husband to go out and cover the bloody snow with fresh snow, sand, or other covering. That's a hard sight for any children and with the state K has been in she doesn't need to see that.

    Doggie heaven was what my parents always told us. It helped us to think they were in a happy place.
  8. 4sumrzn

    4sumrzn New Member

    Oh my...I'm so sorry. I'm sending my thoughts & many {{{hugs}}}. It's so very difficult.
  9. crazymama30

    crazymama30 Active Member

    Toto, I am so sorry. I hope the girls take it fairly well. Hugs to you and yours.
  10. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    I am not mad at the neighbor. SHe is such a sweet lady. I am just mad at the loss. He was our baby.
    Of course husband Said to K, J ran over Indy... I said SHHH!!! I quickly intervened!
    She was a mess, We just told her the truth, That someone ran him over, he stopped breathing, and we don't know why, but he was only put here to live a wonderful 4 months. He blessed our lives for that time. We will remember him and all of that, the photos and he is in a wonderful place. He had a great time here, now he has moved on.
    We can't choose how long we live or why, but we must respect it and try to make the most of it, and Indy made the most of it!

    She was very sad but seemed OK with our talk. She wanted to go out to the truck and say Good bye to him. I did not let her see his head. She patted him and said some words to him and was OK.

    husband went over and talked to the neighbor. She was a mess, he told her it was not her fault, she wanted to pay for the cremation, we said no. He told her he was sorry. None of it was fair to anyone... Just so sad for all of us.

    I quickly put all of his things away, while husband was picking K up. I need that. The cleanse.
    Between me being sick and trying to get everything done for the trip on Tuesday. This is so overwhelming. Not that these things ever come at a good time.
    K has lost a couple of fish and 3 hermit crabs and we had little funerals. So I think she was ready to deal with loss, and she lost her Great Grandma last year. She did OK with that also. She is strange that way, out of sight out of mind....

    Thanks for all of the very kind words...
    I miss him so much...:missyou::cool_dog:
  11. Abbey

    Abbey Spork Queen

    So, so sorry. Your neighbor must feel horrible as well. Hugs to all.

  12. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    Oh, Totoro, I am so sorry. Losing furbabies is so hard.

    Have you heard of Raindbow Bridge? My wee difficult child has a big soft spot and he enjoyed the poem and the pretty website. Maybe K (and you) would find solace in a visit to their site.

    Many hugs.
  13. Big Bad Kitty

    Big Bad Kitty lolcat

    Oh, man.

    No no no.

    Not poopypants.

    How can I be crying over a dog I never met? I don't even like dogs! Totoro I am just so sorry. Sending hugs to cradle your hurting heart. Sending love to comfort your grieving family.

    So, so sorry sweetie.

  14. totoro

    totoro Mom? What's a GFG?

    Thank you Shari, I posted a tribute for him. Made me start crying all over again. husband said everyone in the vets office started crying when he showed up.
    They had all fallen for Indy. The head lady at the front desk had to leave the office. She was a wreck. It is such a sad thing. He was such a goofy little thing. He was one of those little pups that made you smile just seeing him. My father in law was scared to death of dogs, and he liked him.
    Oh this is gonna take a lot of time...
    Of course K is becoming elevated. She is in her rapid forced speech... can't stop. I know everything phase! Lovely. I am trying to stay calm.
    I so need a break.
  15. meowbunny

    meowbunny New Member

    I'm so very sorry. I'm with BBK -- why am I sitting here in tears over a dog I've never met (but I do like dogs). As with most things, time will heal the pain. I'm glad you went to Rainbow Bridge.

    HUGS to all of you.
  16. flutterbee

    flutterbee Guest

    Oh, T, I'm so, so sorry. I'm sitting here crying, too. How horrible for everyone. I wish I could start this day over.

    I had Cassie cremated, too. I haven't spread her ashes, yet. I just can't bring myself to part with her. One day I will though because she would like that.

  17. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    I am sobbing as well Toto.......I am so so SO sorry. I just, know how hard, and horrible this is.
    I know how hard it is to loose a beloved pet. I think I have posted about my cat Ash before, and his untimely death. I still cry when I think of him, and it has been 3 years. It is horrible. I still miss him.
    K, is probably like Matthew - in that it takes time to sink in. When Ash was killed, it took Matthew probably 3 days, before it all really sunk in. Or maybe it was when I stopped crying, that he felt it OK to be upset. I don't know.

    I just am so sorry. It is all I can say. I feel sick for you. It is especially hard to loose a pet in an accident, like Indy and Ash. There is the added drama of the physical injuries, that just makes it even more traumatic.
    More hugs are being sent, than cyber possible.:mad:
  18. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    Oh, Totoro, I am so very sorry. He was such a lovebug!!!! Saying prayers and sending up positive thoughts for you to get through all of this. HUGS!!!!

  19. Star*

    Star* call 911


    I am so sorry. I am sitting here crying for you, the kids - our little Moose. I think you're right - you had a blessing for 4 short months.

    I think God needed a puppy and took the sweetest one he could find on earth.

    My most sincere condolences -
  20. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm so sorry Totoro.