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Parent Emeritus
Instructed to repost this here, thanks.
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<blockquote data-quote="stepparentincrisis" data-source="post: 620705" data-attributes="member: 17702"><p>Signorina, thanks for the reply. I take absolute no offense to anything you wrote, I agree with pretty much everything you said. Earlier in this, I mentioned to my wife when I came across this board, this is what I feel we need to do but if you cannot, this is what I need to do. I still believe that. The whirlwind pace of all this happening, him getting kicked out of the last place, running away, being dropped on our doorstep in the middle of the night, it just happened so quick and most of my wife's time is occupied working (like me) and dealing with him. I know that I cannot force her to see this my way. I think in theory she does want to detach, I just think it will take her longer to put in into practice than it will with me. I know she is doing everything we agree that needed to be done, it's just the results are going to take awhile. Ugh, it really is so hard to put into words... The simple way to put it is like this: I can detach right now by moving out of the house. My wife cannot. If she is unable to reach the decision I did, I am ok with it but I am not going to let this blessed little difficult child dictate how I feel anymore. And when I am home, knowing we can get a knock on the door, a call from the police, anytime we hear a siren in our neighborhood, we instantly clench up and worry, I am so tired of it all I feel like an old man and I am not.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="stepparentincrisis, post: 620705, member: 17702"] Signorina, thanks for the reply. I take absolute no offense to anything you wrote, I agree with pretty much everything you said. Earlier in this, I mentioned to my wife when I came across this board, this is what I feel we need to do but if you cannot, this is what I need to do. I still believe that. The whirlwind pace of all this happening, him getting kicked out of the last place, running away, being dropped on our doorstep in the middle of the night, it just happened so quick and most of my wife's time is occupied working (like me) and dealing with him. I know that I cannot force her to see this my way. I think in theory she does want to detach, I just think it will take her longer to put in into practice than it will with me. I know she is doing everything we agree that needed to be done, it's just the results are going to take awhile. Ugh, it really is so hard to put into words... The simple way to put it is like this: I can detach right now by moving out of the house. My wife cannot. If she is unable to reach the decision I did, I am ok with it but I am not going to let this blessed little difficult child dictate how I feel anymore. And when I am home, knowing we can get a knock on the door, a call from the police, anytime we hear a siren in our neighborhood, we instantly clench up and worry, I am so tired of it all I feel like an old man and I am not. [/QUOTE]
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Instructed to repost this here, thanks.
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