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Interesting article: Rigid parenting CAUSES sex in teens!
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<blockquote data-quote="bran155" data-source="post: 229683"><p>Are we talking about "normal" teens? I think it is a whole other ball game when it comes to difficult children. In my own experience with my mother and sister I agree. My mom was so strict with me, I was grounded for months on end for the tiniest infraction. I rebelled, climbed out windows, stole her car, did not tell her much, never trusted her with any personal information as she would only use it against me. Her husband hated me and that didn't help. My sister, on the other hand was a goody two shoes as my mother pretty much let her do whatever she wanted. She could hang out with whom ever she chose. My mother hated my friends, blamed them for all of my wrong doings. My sister could stay out as late as she wanted. I was on a strict curfew, therefore I lied a lot. My sister was given enough rope to hang herself with and she never did. She always made good choices, never got into any real trouble. I always got into trouble. Nothing serious though. I did smoke a lot of pot, drank somewhat but never did hard drugs. I wouldn't say that I slept around but I did sleep with more guys than my sister. </p><p></p><p>I tried to be as open as I could with my daughter and did not keep her on "lock down". She was never allowed to do whatever she wanted, however I was not very strict with her for fear of rebellion. Then again we are now talking about a difficult child who lives in her own little world where regular rules do not apply. I think when talking about a child with mental illness, all normal parenting goes out the window. Especially with regards to sex. Hypersexuality is a symptom of some disorders. I also think sex is directly related to your self esteem. Lot's of kids have sex to fit in or feel loved. A very sad reality. I have always taught my daughter to respect her body, that it is precsious, that sex should not be taken lightly. Her value does not come from her willingness to have sex. We have had the "sex" talk a gazillion times. On every level imaginable!!! It never stuck. I think whatever I could have taught her came second to her issues. She just wants to be loved. I also think that an absent father makes a difference in the way a young girl feels about herself, her self worth. They say that little girls get their self esteem from their daddys. In my daughter's case I truly believe that she views her body and sex as a way to make up for her inadequcies (sp). She knows she is different, therefore she can make up that difference with the use of her body. Very sad. </p><p></p><p>I'm sorry for all of the babbling!!!! I got a bit carried away. Good topic though. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="bran155, post: 229683"] Are we talking about "normal" teens? I think it is a whole other ball game when it comes to difficult children. In my own experience with my mother and sister I agree. My mom was so strict with me, I was grounded for months on end for the tiniest infraction. I rebelled, climbed out windows, stole her car, did not tell her much, never trusted her with any personal information as she would only use it against me. Her husband hated me and that didn't help. My sister, on the other hand was a goody two shoes as my mother pretty much let her do whatever she wanted. She could hang out with whom ever she chose. My mother hated my friends, blamed them for all of my wrong doings. My sister could stay out as late as she wanted. I was on a strict curfew, therefore I lied a lot. My sister was given enough rope to hang herself with and she never did. She always made good choices, never got into any real trouble. I always got into trouble. Nothing serious though. I did smoke a lot of pot, drank somewhat but never did hard drugs. I wouldn't say that I slept around but I did sleep with more guys than my sister. I tried to be as open as I could with my daughter and did not keep her on "lock down". She was never allowed to do whatever she wanted, however I was not very strict with her for fear of rebellion. Then again we are now talking about a difficult child who lives in her own little world where regular rules do not apply. I think when talking about a child with mental illness, all normal parenting goes out the window. Especially with regards to sex. Hypersexuality is a symptom of some disorders. I also think sex is directly related to your self esteem. Lot's of kids have sex to fit in or feel loved. A very sad reality. I have always taught my daughter to respect her body, that it is precsious, that sex should not be taken lightly. Her value does not come from her willingness to have sex. We have had the "sex" talk a gazillion times. On every level imaginable!!! It never stuck. I think whatever I could have taught her came second to her issues. She just wants to be loved. I also think that an absent father makes a difference in the way a young girl feels about herself, her self worth. They say that little girls get their self esteem from their daddys. In my daughter's case I truly believe that she views her body and sex as a way to make up for her inadequcies (sp). She knows she is different, therefore she can make up that difference with the use of her body. Very sad. I'm sorry for all of the babbling!!!! I got a bit carried away. Good topic though. :) [/QUOTE]
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