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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 610756" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>I took a weekend long seminar many years ago the title of which was "Entrepreneurial tools." It was facilitated by a sort of well known guy who had been in a South American prison for political reasons for quite some time. (Brings to mind Nelson Mandela.) He was one interesting dude. On Friday night, standing behind a podium addressing us, his opening statement to us was "<em>Suffering is a linguistic phenomenon, it happens in our languaging." </em></p><p></p><p>I have never forgotten how powerfully that hit me. That is where I picked up the term languaging. It fits well, doesn't it? And, I have pondered that statement he made for all these years.............a statement which was born while he was in prison..........one can only imagine what his self talk was and how he rose above his circumstances. And yet, his suffering cracked open a part of him that produced a philosophy which he ended up teaching to others..................interesting isn't it? </p><p></p><p>There are a number of quotes that I ponder for years attempting to glean the meaning out of.........the suffering quote is one of them. </p><p></p><p>There is another which I read in a book on Buddhism many years ago........."the Great Way is open to those who have no preferences." It was addressing judgement and the Buddhist view on compassion and balance.</p><p></p><p>I agree that <span style="color: #000000">we</span><em> "<span style="color: #0000FF">needed to be this healed before we could risk that.</span>" </em>My understanding is that for those of us so wounded, the psyche needs to be a certain strength before it can engage in the real truth..........and once we can, in integrating that truth, I believe that is where the real authenticity happens. And, the power to be one's real, authentic self. Yes, I do agree that in being vulnerable, one is being real, being authentic and thereby powerful in one's truth.</p><p></p><p>On both sides in my family Cedar, women have had virtually no power. My Dad was born in another country, completely patriarchal. My mother's family was, as I view it now as an adult, void of any feminine qualities, it was a cold and unforgiving environment. My parents were products of their upbringing which perhaps lent itself to raging and mental illnesses. I think when you are completely arrested in your authenticity, your real self, you can quite literally, go crazy. No one in my immediate family has "thawed out." Except me. </p><p></p><p>Maybe those red dresses were bits of myself stored away to keep me safe in a hostile environment.............red being the color of vitality, blood, passion............all hidden underneath fear. You've made a good point, it makes sense.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: #000000">"</span><span style="color: #0000ff">In your love for your daughter, in your decision to change things for her...you stepped up, Recovering.</span></p><p><span style="color: #0000ff">And began the work you were born to do</span><span style="color: #000000">." </span> Thank you Cedar. I would venture to say the same about you. And, if I look back throughout my life, I have always been involved in service, volunteering, helping, trying to share what I've learned............<em>the positive and flip side of enabling.</em>......It sounds as if you have too...........what appears to be happening now is that I am finding myself in more situations where my odd and unique skill set can be put to good use in assisting others who have a similar background or similar circumstances or utilizing my communication skill to be helpful in other ways. I think I have somehow owned a certain power/authenticity within myself, which may have always been there, but now feels integrated. In experiencing my own sense of wholeness and inner certainty, my place in the scheme of life seems to be stabilized in a way it had not been possible before. Are you having any experiences like that? </p><p></p><p>I can't help but imagine that all of this recent learning places us on a new and improved "Mission" which is revealing itself now. I'm actually preparing myself for this change now, even though I am not sure how it will look, it feels imminent. Do you have that sense too?</p><p></p><p><span style="color: #008000">"</span><em><span style="color: #0000ff">Beneath the wheeling circle of the stars, the journey begins."</span></em></p><p><em><span style="color: #0000ff"></span></em><span style="color: #008000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #008000">One of my more whimsical favorite quotes is, "we don't know where we're going, but we're on our way!"</span></p><p><span style="color: #008000"></span><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p></p><p></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 610756, member: 13542"] I took a weekend long seminar many years ago the title of which was "Entrepreneurial tools." It was facilitated by a sort of well known guy who had been in a South American prison for political reasons for quite some time. (Brings to mind Nelson Mandela.) He was one interesting dude. On Friday night, standing behind a podium addressing us, his opening statement to us was "[I]Suffering is a linguistic phenomenon, it happens in our languaging." [/I] I have never forgotten how powerfully that hit me. That is where I picked up the term languaging. It fits well, doesn't it? And, I have pondered that statement he made for all these years.............a statement which was born while he was in prison..........one can only imagine what his self talk was and how he rose above his circumstances. And yet, his suffering cracked open a part of him that produced a philosophy which he ended up teaching to others..................interesting isn't it? There are a number of quotes that I ponder for years attempting to glean the meaning out of.........the suffering quote is one of them. There is another which I read in a book on Buddhism many years ago........."the Great Way is open to those who have no preferences." It was addressing judgement and the Buddhist view on compassion and balance. I agree that [COLOR=#000000]we[/COLOR][I] "[COLOR=#0000FF]needed to be this healed before we could risk that.[/COLOR]" [/I]My understanding is that for those of us so wounded, the psyche needs to be a certain strength before it can engage in the real truth..........and once we can, in integrating that truth, I believe that is where the real authenticity happens. And, the power to be one's real, authentic self. Yes, I do agree that in being vulnerable, one is being real, being authentic and thereby powerful in one's truth. On both sides in my family Cedar, women have had virtually no power. My Dad was born in another country, completely patriarchal. My mother's family was, as I view it now as an adult, void of any feminine qualities, it was a cold and unforgiving environment. My parents were products of their upbringing which perhaps lent itself to raging and mental illnesses. I think when you are completely arrested in your authenticity, your real self, you can quite literally, go crazy. No one in my immediate family has "thawed out." Except me. Maybe those red dresses were bits of myself stored away to keep me safe in a hostile environment.............red being the color of vitality, blood, passion............all hidden underneath fear. You've made a good point, it makes sense. [COLOR=#000000]"[/COLOR][COLOR=#0000ff]In your love for your daughter, in your decision to change things for her...you stepped up, Recovering. And began the work you were born to do[/COLOR][COLOR=#000000]." [/COLOR] Thank you Cedar. I would venture to say the same about you. And, if I look back throughout my life, I have always been involved in service, volunteering, helping, trying to share what I've learned............[I]the positive and flip side of enabling.[/I]......It sounds as if you have too...........what appears to be happening now is that I am finding myself in more situations where my odd and unique skill set can be put to good use in assisting others who have a similar background or similar circumstances or utilizing my communication skill to be helpful in other ways. I think I have somehow owned a certain power/authenticity within myself, which may have always been there, but now feels integrated. In experiencing my own sense of wholeness and inner certainty, my place in the scheme of life seems to be stabilized in a way it had not been possible before. Are you having any experiences like that? I can't help but imagine that all of this recent learning places us on a new and improved "Mission" which is revealing itself now. I'm actually preparing myself for this change now, even though I am not sure how it will look, it feels imminent. Do you have that sense too? [COLOR=#008000]"[/COLOR][I][COLOR=#0000ff]Beneath the wheeling circle of the stars, the journey begins." [/COLOR][/I][COLOR=#008000] One of my more whimsical favorite quotes is, "we don't know where we're going, but we're on our way!" [/COLOR][COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR] [COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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