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<blockquote data-quote="Hopeless" data-source="post: 104682" data-attributes="member: 4409"><p>Thanks Nola for the welcome.</p><p></p><p>I really am dreading the Holidays because I never know if difficult child is going to be in a good mood or a horrible ugly mood. It is like a light switch off and on with her. husband and her do not see eye to eye on things and I try to keep everyone happy when she does come over to our house. Which she has not been to our house in about 3 months.</p><p></p><p>Sometimes I wish I could just say to her: "I am through with you and your choices. Please do not contact me anymore when you are in trouble." But then the guilt sets in that maybe I did something wrong with her and it is my fault that she makes the choices she does.</p><p></p><p>I never, ever thought she would end up in her life as she has. She lives with a boyfriend (another difficult child) and they blame all of their problems on everyone else. When she needs money or a car ride somewhere, she calls us. If I do not drop what I am doing at that exact moment to come to her rescure then I am a "horrible mother and she cannot stand me" her words are much more colorful and I get more depressed everytime I hear from her.</p><p></p><p>My mother has taking difficult child's side and when difficult child gets into legal trouble or has an issue, my mother then calls us to get us to help out. I just want to wash my hands of the entire situation and I guess bury my head in the sand. My difficult child is 19 and I feel what choices she makes, she should have to deal with the concequences. That took many years of trying to please everyone in my family before I relealized during the past 6 months, that I cannot make them all happy.</p><p></p><p>I want to enjoy my life, without having to worry about when the phone rings what problems have now happened to her.</p><p></p><p>As you can tell by my rambling, I think with my heart and head at different times.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hopeless, post: 104682, member: 4409"] Thanks Nola for the welcome. I really am dreading the Holidays because I never know if difficult child is going to be in a good mood or a horrible ugly mood. It is like a light switch off and on with her. husband and her do not see eye to eye on things and I try to keep everyone happy when she does come over to our house. Which she has not been to our house in about 3 months. Sometimes I wish I could just say to her: "I am through with you and your choices. Please do not contact me anymore when you are in trouble." But then the guilt sets in that maybe I did something wrong with her and it is my fault that she makes the choices she does. I never, ever thought she would end up in her life as she has. She lives with a boyfriend (another difficult child) and they blame all of their problems on everyone else. When she needs money or a car ride somewhere, she calls us. If I do not drop what I am doing at that exact moment to come to her rescure then I am a "horrible mother and she cannot stand me" her words are much more colorful and I get more depressed everytime I hear from her. My mother has taking difficult child's side and when difficult child gets into legal trouble or has an issue, my mother then calls us to get us to help out. I just want to wash my hands of the entire situation and I guess bury my head in the sand. My difficult child is 19 and I feel what choices she makes, she should have to deal with the concequences. That took many years of trying to please everyone in my family before I relealized during the past 6 months, that I cannot make them all happy. I want to enjoy my life, without having to worry about when the phone rings what problems have now happened to her. As you can tell by my rambling, I think with my heart and head at different times. [/QUOTE]
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