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is the summer worse or better
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<blockquote data-quote="InsaneCdn" data-source="post: 445621" data-attributes="member: 11791"><p>Summer is a catch-22. Its either so much better than during the school year that the result is 2x culture shock (transitioning into summer and then back into school), OR its even worse than school partly due to differences in schedule etc. and partly due to the kinds of activities...</p><p></p><p>In my opinion, camp is just about the WORST possible place... maybe, sometimes, school is worse, but not by much. Large groups of kids with inexperienced supervision (think university students, at best), chaos, noise, etc. Most "normal" (i.e. neurotypical) kids can barely handle it... difficult children don't have a chance. So, they get massively overwhelmed/overloaded/worn out/frustrated/etc. And then either blow up THERE (and sometimes get kicked out of camp etc.), OR, blow up at HOME.</p><p></p><p>So, I'd totally second Seriously's comments about camp... and about part-time work for at least one of you, IF NOT BOTH. been there done that. Doing it again. difficult children requlre <u>full-time parenting</u> - which may or may not allow for part-time work! Yes, its REALLY hard on the wallet. These kids cost way more to look after, to start with (medications, appointments, special equipment, replacing stuff that gets damaged - whether intentional or not - etc.). And then to take a major income hit? And the tax systems don't recognize the kinds of problems these kids have as being worthy of tax breaks, even. Its really tough, some days. But, as Step said, its either that or something way worse.</p><p></p><p>We look on summer - and for the rest of the year, evenings, weekends and holidays - as "recovery" time - the only chance we get to try to build up the reserves and skills they need to survive another day/week/year of school. We pack the summer full of GOOD stuff - but carefully planned to avoid the overwhelmed/overloaded/worn out/frustrated minefields. Our kids can handle huge physical and mental challenges but not chaos. So, NO CAMP for us. Which means... NO down-time for US. The advantage is that while we're not getting down-time, we're also not getting the GFGness nearly so much - so, it doesn't take as much out of us emotionally. (mentally, trying to stay ahead of them for 10 weeks, the planning, etc., is HUGE)</p><p></p><p>Sometimes, though, MINOR changes make a big difference. There was one year when camp actually went fairly well... but it was 90% OUTDOOR - so, while the kids were still "loud", it doesn't generate the same issues for our kids. It depends on THE KID. And the only way you're going to really find out what works, what doesn't, and why... is to BE THERE. No one else on the planet is going to care enough to do what has to be done for your kid(s). </p><p>(except maybe the occasional really, really exceptional step-parent... we have some of those around this site!)</p><p></p><p>{{hugs}}</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="InsaneCdn, post: 445621, member: 11791"] Summer is a catch-22. Its either so much better than during the school year that the result is 2x culture shock (transitioning into summer and then back into school), OR its even worse than school partly due to differences in schedule etc. and partly due to the kinds of activities... In my opinion, camp is just about the WORST possible place... maybe, sometimes, school is worse, but not by much. Large groups of kids with inexperienced supervision (think university students, at best), chaos, noise, etc. Most "normal" (i.e. neurotypical) kids can barely handle it... difficult children don't have a chance. So, they get massively overwhelmed/overloaded/worn out/frustrated/etc. And then either blow up THERE (and sometimes get kicked out of camp etc.), OR, blow up at HOME. So, I'd totally second Seriously's comments about camp... and about part-time work for at least one of you, IF NOT BOTH. been there done that. Doing it again. difficult children requlre [U]full-time parenting[/U] - which may or may not allow for part-time work! Yes, its REALLY hard on the wallet. These kids cost way more to look after, to start with (medications, appointments, special equipment, replacing stuff that gets damaged - whether intentional or not - etc.). And then to take a major income hit? And the tax systems don't recognize the kinds of problems these kids have as being worthy of tax breaks, even. Its really tough, some days. But, as Step said, its either that or something way worse. We look on summer - and for the rest of the year, evenings, weekends and holidays - as "recovery" time - the only chance we get to try to build up the reserves and skills they need to survive another day/week/year of school. We pack the summer full of GOOD stuff - but carefully planned to avoid the overwhelmed/overloaded/worn out/frustrated minefields. Our kids can handle huge physical and mental challenges but not chaos. So, NO CAMP for us. Which means... NO down-time for US. The advantage is that while we're not getting down-time, we're also not getting the GFGness nearly so much - so, it doesn't take as much out of us emotionally. (mentally, trying to stay ahead of them for 10 weeks, the planning, etc., is HUGE) Sometimes, though, MINOR changes make a big difference. There was one year when camp actually went fairly well... but it was 90% OUTDOOR - so, while the kids were still "loud", it doesn't generate the same issues for our kids. It depends on THE KID. And the only way you're going to really find out what works, what doesn't, and why... is to BE THERE. No one else on the planet is going to care enough to do what has to be done for your kid(s). (except maybe the occasional really, really exceptional step-parent... we have some of those around this site!) {{hugs}} [/QUOTE]
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