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Family of Origin
Is there a time we can and should say good-bye to our past?
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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 664477" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>This is an interesting point. Over time, we somehow come to believe we initiated the exclusion and berate ourselves for it. Over time we do that. Nostalgia filters out the painful things. There is a quote about that. Something about nostalgia being a distillation of haunted desires ~ of things that never were, things that we long for and wish we could have again. In our own minds then, we may be blending the truth of what was with the wishes we have for what it could and should have been. Then, we see these really crummy things from our pasts in a better light, regret our having chosen to protect ourselves from undeniably toxic interactions, and berate ourselves for lost things that we never had at all. The truth may have been that we chose health over interacting with family with whom we were uncomfortable for good reason.</p><p></p><p>As we have done our work on the FOO Chronicles, I found what I remembered to have been so unlike what actually happened, once I forced myself to take a look at it. The meanness in what was and in what is happening today is shocking.</p><p></p><p>I would always post that I was so surprised. What I meant was WTF.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 664477, member: 17461"] This is an interesting point. Over time, we somehow come to believe we initiated the exclusion and berate ourselves for it. Over time we do that. Nostalgia filters out the painful things. There is a quote about that. Something about nostalgia being a distillation of haunted desires ~ of things that never were, things that we long for and wish we could have again. In our own minds then, we may be blending the truth of what was with the wishes we have for what it could and should have been. Then, we see these really crummy things from our pasts in a better light, regret our having chosen to protect ourselves from undeniably toxic interactions, and berate ourselves for lost things that we never had at all. The truth may have been that we chose health over interacting with family with whom we were uncomfortable for good reason. As we have done our work on the FOO Chronicles, I found what I remembered to have been so unlike what actually happened, once I forced myself to take a look at it. The meanness in what was and in what is happening today is shocking. I would always post that I was so surprised. What I meant was WTF. Cedar [/QUOTE]
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Family of Origin
Is there a time we can and should say good-bye to our past?
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