It Happened...

[BusynMember]

Yeek. I don't know your financial situation, but, as you see, as she spends time with her dad even sweet difficult child stepdaughter is going to be a danger to you. Nice skewed police report. You have more patience than me. I'd be gone with my kids, leaving him to fend for himself, including the bills. I'd sell the house at a loss unless it would put my children in poverty. If it were only ME to worry about, I'd rather live in a rented room in somebody's house than with him and his nutsy kid. I wouldn't worry about anything else except getting out of that crazy house. I'd even consider leaving the state unless my job didn't allow it, but I'd certainly leave unless there was absolutely no way I couldn't do it. You won't be able to help stepdaughter. In the end, she'll lie to CPS on behalf of her father who will scare her to pieces. "She's not your mother so it's ME you have to please, blahl, blah, blah." Of course lying is a way of life for both her and the boy.

If you don't get out of there before he does it again and blames it on you again, you could end up in jail. What a waste for an intelligent, caring woman who has raised such wonderful children. Get them out of that crazy situation too.

Ah, just a suggestion. I"m frustrated for you. Sadly, I thinlk even Stepdaughter might end up all screwed up, but you can save yourself and your own kids from more craziness.

 

[WSM]

I got the restraining order until 9/24. Then we go before a judge, the judge will decide if he will grant the alimony for half the mortgage then.

husband turned off all the utilities, but I stayed ahead of him. I don't want the landline, I didn't miss a beat with the electric, the tv is still showing our tivo'd selections but we won't get service for a couple days. And I'm on free linksys for internet, it will be set up in my name next week. I think the car insurance is cut off too.

He came by at dinner with stepdau and stepson and two cops and took out more clothes and two mattresses. Stepdau was afraid to look at me. Sigh... Just before he left, he said: I'm sorry for the mean things I said.

So I guess he's got an apartment. Wonder where he got the money.

So now I've got an extra $454 a month for his car that's in my name, $700 in utilities, and probably his share of the mortgage $1440 and his share of the heloc $150. And there's a ton of work that needs to be done on the house about $2000 and I just finished paying for his car accident for my car: $1000.

Financial abuse is a form of abuse too.

I'll see if tomorrow I can talk to a realtor. Zillow says the house is worth about $365K, I need it to be $380K to break even. I don't know how accurate Zillow is. We have some plusses (on a lake, new pool and kitchen), and some unfinished projects (halfway finished upper hall floors, unfinished ceiling in kitchen) so maybe $340K? That's $40K debt. Plus I need about $4000 to move into a new apartment.

I feel very overwhelmed. I'll make it, but...dam I'm sad and anxious.

But this is for the best and I know it. I just wish it was over.

 

[Star*]

Just a thought - find someone locally that flips houses and see if you can work WITH them on selling the property and getting your money out of the deal.

Another option would be to take out a 2nd mortgage NOW - and use that money to get an apartment today - then rent the place to someone for more than you owe plus fixing- say rent it to a handy man type person?

Just thinking out loud....

Also it would PROBABLY be a really good idea to get the locks changed even if you do that yourself. Or at the very least - take anything of value or private papers, computer tower, medicines etc with you when you leave. You can put baby powder down in front of the doors to see if someone has been there - foot print wise.