it seriously never ends/medication change with-no notification

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Jena, Oct 9, 2010.

  1. Jena

    Jena New Member

    i leave today, leave difficult child tell dr. ok im going to trust you yet any medication changes at all i am to know about them prior to you doing them. ok ofcourse he tells me.

    i come to find out upon calling nurses station for my one token phone call tonight that difficult child is in bathroom in pain and constipated (probably due to no liquids or food) with the lithium and doctor increased her seroquel and is going to be adding on xanax!!! WTF

    I said are you kidding me??? your kidding me right?? i said difficult child flies manic beyond belief on any benzo i've tried 4 so far. you are not allowed Occupational Therapist (OT) make medication change with-o notifying me at all. I told them have dr. call me immediately.

    i called husband he said wow i can't believe this ****. you gotta pull her if he's going to do this. great.

    nurse also tells me that difficult child was so anxious at dinner tonight she couldnt' eat her food. how the **** is that her standing her ground and controlling the world? how she was too anxious all day to eat.

    i just don't get it. i go thru crying from jersey all the way to queens. that's alot of tears get ok with-this pull up in driveway text husband and tell him ok let's watch a movie tonight and try to have a marriage and be normal than this happens.
  2. Jena

    Jena New Member

    ok so is it me? dr. said specifically any medication changes we will notify you prior to for you to know, let us know if you have tried before and reaction and also approval. than he goes and does this? wouldn't you guys lose trust after all this junk and conversation today??

    i call nurses station back to see if difficult child is off floor and if out of pain with constipation and they tell me we have a situation with-difficult child right now we gotta call you back???
  3. smallworld

    smallworld Moderator

    Jen, Seroquel is the medication that causes constipation. Plus kids with eating disorders get constipated from not eating. It happened to my daughter.

    I agree with you that I would be angry with the docs at the hospital for not notifying you about medication changes. That should not happen under any circumstances (except if there is life endangerment, but I'm not sure that was the case today).

  4. Jena

    Jena New Member

    oh man. i'm like are you kidding me?? nurse called back. difficult child is totally anxiety ridden at this point and they were going to give her xanax to bring her down. yet luckily the nurse she likes was there and sat with-her and calmed her down and helped her go to the bathroom with-o medications. difficult child was anxiety ridden and refused her medications tonight. nurse left it alone and didn't inject her with-them.

    they said dr will call in a.m.

    this just kinda seems to not be going smoothly at all?
    Last edited: Oct 9, 2010
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I'm not sure at this for right now. It sounds like they might be qualified but are still trying to figure out for sure what the problem is- how much is defiance, controlling, phobia, unrealistic expectations, etc.

    Detach some Jen and try to find yourself again and enjoy your marriage. No matter what they come up with, this will help the situation and more than likely if you stand back and detach a little you will be able to make more rational and objective decisions. That's all I know to do when I feel overwhelmed with koi.
  6. Jena

    Jena New Member

    klmno i know what you mean. yet i can't have the dr. making medication changes with-o letting me know. that's just absurd. i'm glad nurse told me and it's the one i like because i was able to clue her in to the reaction from the medication. she than called dr who said ok listen to jen and don't give that she knows medications difficult child's been on we dont' know them all.
  7. Andy

    Andy Active Member

    Does the doctor even have difficult child's past medical info? I am sure that was given during the intake process. I often wonder if some docs even bother to read history in any depth.

    I am thinking that it may be beneficial for you to write down everything you have given difficult child and how each one effected her.

    Write down things that they do not seem to be taking into account (even if they have it in her records) and present everything to the doctor.

    Keep a copy for yourself and date it. That way they have to acknowledge that you gave them the information you believed was the most critical to help difficult child.

    Include her interests and what she is good at which should be part of her recovery. They need to know her as an entire person - not just the hard to deal with part.

    I know their job is to work on why she is there but I also believe the more you know about a kid (good and bad), the easier it is to see the "bad" as a challenge that is blocking the "good" - a challenge that must be tackled and the "good" upheld.

    She is very strong willed - so are my two kids. I always told my kids that they can use that strong willed side to fight anything. They can use it to better their lives instead of holding themselves back. However, along with that, she also needs to trust people which may be the first step right now. She feels at a loss right now - she is not able to see you and she still doesn't feel the motivation of the facility staff is to help her.

    It is good the nurse got her through something without medications. When difficult child was hospitalized, we had a similar situation. He was very anxious and refused the medication to calm him. I was very proud of him for doing so as I told the staff that if the night staff would have listened to him and let him know they understood/cared, he may have taken it. I hated that the night/weekend staff seemed not to work with him on his tools - they just wanted to drug him and get him back to bed. He felt that way also and knew that the automatic giving of medications was a cop out on their part and he wasn't going to allow that. And all they had to do was sit and talk a few minutes and ask him again after explaining why they wanted to give it and he may not have bulked it and maybe not even have needed it.

    You may want to also talk to the head nurse about their policy of medication changes with minors. I think if memory serves me right, I was always informed about medication changes and either signed something or gave verbal consent over the phone.
    We were so new to any medications that I was too inexperienced to really know to disagree so I just went with the flow and forgot about it. You have experienced so many different medications with negative outcomes that you do need to stay on your toes about what is going on with her medications. The doctor should be happy that you can remember each one and want to be part of the process.
  8. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Lots of times they will use a xanax or even haldol PRN if a child is out of control. Its called a chemical restraint instead of a physical one. You just have to flow with it. Im sure it wasnt going to be a long term change in medications. Im not even sure that seroquel comes in an injectible form, it might be that they are using one of the others such as risperdal or zyprexa which I think do come in injectibles. Or this might be a threat to get her to take them.

    I am giving you advice from the other side of the mountain. I remember all the cries to come get him. All the threats, tears, stories about how awful it was in these places. Truthfully, there was only one place that was a place I had to pull him from myself and one place that was shut down on us. This was after so many placements I cant even count them all. Most are really decent placements.
  9. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

    I don't think this is a doctor's error. With all of Kanga's psychiatric hospital stays, the doctor would order a medication change pending parental consent and it was the job of a nurse to call me and get consent. Sometimes the nurses 'forgot' but the doctor would be just as upset as I was as he counts on that step to catch anything like this (history of manic reactions to benzos, etc).

    I'm pretty sure that the chemical restraint PRNs are given with-o consent because it is considered an emergency situation.
  10. Jena

    Jena New Member


    thanks for always guiding me with this. yet difficult child was not out of control at all. she was anxiety ridden and crying because now she's too anxious to eat.