It took years...but I'm back.

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by Never-tap-out, Feb 20, 2010.

  1. Never-tap-out

    Never-tap-out New Member

    Let me reintroduce myself. Way back in 1999, or 2000 I was lucky enough to find this fledgling website and a whole bunch of fabulous (exhausted) moms who helped me through a lot. I was about 24 at the time and trying to keep my head above water. I had a daughter with an array of things going on that would all be labeled mild (but in tandem and on a daily basis it sure didn't feel so "mild"!)...and a daughter two years younger. I think my firstborn was about 3 when I first found Conduct Disorders. She is now 13 and actually a great kid. (Remnants of the same behaviors sometimes remind me of how bad it used to be...but it's great overall.)

    So you're wondering why I'm back aren't ya? Well, she has a sister who is two years younger and I guess just didn't want to let her sister be the only one to charter this particular ship. Why, oh why, am I again the unwilling captain? Well, I've been in denial for 6 years. My child has ODD and it's wearing me out. I want to believe it will all work out okay....but she is now 11 and while also a wonderful person, this condition is just devastating and sometimes I feel like I'm lucky it hasn't ripped our family apart. I do fear it will be a more intense struggle in the years to come and so I am back for support and guidance down this well worn path.

    Well, I have to say I actually got giddy when I found you guys. You all know what I mean. You felt the same way when you found a place full of people that could relate and might have answers. ;) I got disconnected from the group because of a lot of things. Moves, life changes, husbands deployments, and ultimately things (eventually) working out pretty positively with my child that initially brought me here! But ... for the last 3 years I've been trying to find my way back. I could NOT for the life of me remember the name of this website, and at different times through the years I tried to google some catch phrases to try to find it again and today I FOUND the right words. Maybe it took finally admitting the problem and not being in denial- which just happened this week. So here I am. Formerly I was "giella007". I went back through the archives to see if there was anything I recognized. Lo and behold there was one about "mourning the loss of a dream" which had stuck with me ALL these years and had helped me to have a fairly cathartic transition in my parenting/emotions/etc. Very helpful then, and equally so now.

    Where is Fran, by the way? I don't see her name as a moderator anywhere. Has she passed the baton?

    See you around. :tongue:
  2. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Welcome back! :)

    Fran is still here... you can find more of her posts over on the PE (Parent Emeritus) board. She's also on the Healthy Living board and Watercooler...

    That's great to hear that your oldest has improved so much. I'm sure it didn't feel that she'd ever get to this point a few years ago when you were up to your eyes in dealing with her issues.

    When you get a chance, please create a new signature for yourself so that everyone can have a sort of "snapshot" of your situation.

    I look forward to knowing you better!
  3. LittleDudesMom

    LittleDudesMom Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Glad you were able to find us again!

    I second gcv, please do a new profile signature (click on User CP on the upper left and go from there) so we can get the whole picture!

    Good to hear your oldest has setted. Has the youngest been officially diagnosis'd with ODD or is that just what you think? I asked because ODD rarely stands alone, it is usually a term given for a list of behaviors that usually indicate other issues.

    I have personal favor though, as someone who hit the BIG 50 this past December, I had a real hard time reading the tiny print of your post. Could you use a bigger font next time?! These old eyes ain't what they used to be!!!

    Again, welcome back!

  4. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Hi there! I actually vaguely remember your name! Dont remember any specifics because your child is so much younger than mine but that name stands out to me because I always thought Giselle. I cant remember which name I was using back then...jscl117, Corysmom or my current name but I have been here since Feb 1999.

    Oh...Welcome back! I dont post much over here on General because all mine are grown now but I moderate over on PE. I do read over here on General and jump in when I can offer something.
  5. Steely

    Steely Active Member

    Welcome back. It is still the same great people - plus some. I found this board when Matt was 9, and then lost it, just like you. I truly wish I had been able to connect for those 5 years, it would have helped so much.
  6. Never-tap-out

    Never-tap-out New Member

    Hi, and thanks for the warm welcome. :) I sure will do a new signature as soon as I get a few minutes to think. Janet- you were "Corysmom" back then, and I remember you. I look forward to talking to everyone again. And the answer on the ODD diagnosis is that it's my own conclusion and we are seeking out professional diagnosis now. much as I'd like to believe that it's anything else, I was in denial for far too long and I just know.

    Noted the request for readable font size. ;)

    Take care.
  7. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Well, Im still Cory's mom but Im also Grandma to his little girl...and his brother, Jamie's two kids

    Boy do they grow up fast here on the board!