Probably should put this in sp ed but so many of you that I talk with probably dont go there often so I am opting for this forum. the IEP meeting stunk. UGLY from moment one... everyone had an ugly agenda and the things they said about his doing better in speech, dape and classroom, didn't matter even one little bit. the principal acted like Q was a hood. One teacher said he had a day when he went on and on about what if I brought a gun to school and when she talked to him about that he went to a knife etc... Seriously, they said they have zero tolerance and have to be concerned about that. I said, he will talk to you about anything if he gets you to talk to him... Sad to say you were really willing to engage him on this topic instead of something else. We actually have specifically said in meetings that when he starts to talk nonsense (remember this like a grade K kid talking about these things) we say, oh Q, I am not going to talk about silly things, what else can we talk about. When I do that, he always says... OK OK OK... and goes to a different topic... works his way out of the perseverations. She essentially shaped the conversation topic, increased it. He has a new word the "c" word and they act like he brought it to the school. He only could have heard it there so WTH? Principal was making threats about calling the cops etc... I wanted to threaten to get a gun myself...but of course have never even seen a gun in real life except on a policeman's belt. But the fantasy.... I am sure it went far beyond what Q ever has thought...LOL I have pretty much been crying for the last three hours. When I said last Dec that they were pushing him out I was right. they are nto trying, all they are data collecting on is the awful things that he says and does which in and of itself is reinforcing the behaviors and causing them to increase. One teacher even admitted that he begged her not to write something down because it scares him so much. I have said a million times that collecting data in front of him is a trigger. The could give a rip. They say, well we just record what he is doing, even if it is ok... I said, you really think he sees it as that??? When the data was originally collected, the way it worked, was he got points and he got to see the points for getting work done etc. Then when he saw the great work he did he got his sticker or prize or a good job comment or whatever. But he saw it and it was not the scary thing it has turned into which is they are writing things down to kick him out of the school. My psychiatric said he can't go to an ebd program, and you only have offered that. He flat out said this is not how to work with a Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) kid. Law advocate was fuming and went off on them multiple times including how they treat me and how negative they are about Q. I asked the principal to take a few minutes and get to know Q. I said, you know nothing about him except when he is in crisis. I asked him if he ever thought for a second that if he became Q's friend, that it could HELP the situation instead of his being afraid of you and having constant anxiety out of you. They say they had to have admin come down daily .... UMMMM that is because you told the teacher to call admin daily!!!! I was ready to tip the table like they did on the housewives of New Jersey but of course I stayed even keeled and nice. My lawyer said I have to stop acting like a teacher and get mad. I would take him out in a second if I thought he had anywhere to go. But I dont. I told them again I am willing to do homebound and therapies and the district can provide transport or pay me to drive him.... They said he is in that room sometimes ALL day. I specifically have asked that question over and over and the teacher says he is spending time in her room... excuse me??? is it or isn't it happening that way... DOUBLE SPEAK It is so awful, they are hurting him and he does need to leave them but to where??? I am going to observe in district and out of district programs, and willing to open enroll him in another district ( there is a new school being built for kids with autism or any other behavior disorder similar to that from teh ground up for kids with sensory issues etc. but it is far away and maybe even out of our county, I can't move out of this county due to our current services/waiver... not supposed to vary by county but the truth is it does, we have lived that too) I am overwhelmed. I did my job but inside, I feel sick. Heartbroken and afraid for Q.