It's been awhile,

[stepmom47]

I know it's been awhile but I am back.

Here is what has been going on:

difficult child is still living with Bio-mom.

In Nov. we had finally had enough and took him for an evaluation. at a local Behavioral Health Center...they said he was fine and just needed counseling...

In Dec. we deceided to switch his counseling center and he is seeing a therapist now.

His stealing has gotton out of control. His grades are poor, we had the local police come over and talk with him about stealing, it did not stop.

He is now stealing knives & screwdrivers.

We put a lock on easy child's room and he found out a way everytime to break in and steal from her.

All the Therapist said is that he has anger issues...husband went to a session 2 weeks ago and he sat there and said that he is angry. (Nothing specific was said)

Afterwards the therapist handed out the conners test again...bio-mom flipped out and started screaming about medicatiing him again and how he would become suicidal!!

Since then she has not scheduled another visit.

Last visit I was going through his room...(well 1/2 of it is his, the other half is storage) he once again went in our room and stole from us. I found the stuff hidden in one of my boxes.

The therapist has stated all along that we need to have him arrested, this time I called and had them come and get him.

We have decieded that he is no longer welcome here at this point. husband will go every two weeks and take him somewhere for a couple of hours.

I know that this is harsh but, the therapist has had no other suggestions for us on how to handle the issues at hand

We are at this point all out of options ( and books to read) and anything we suggest to Bio-mom...she fights us tooth and nail. He evens steals from her....

husband is so sad about all this

Thanks for listening....

 

[BusynMember]

Curiously, has he ever been evaluated by more than a therapist? Has he had a full evaluation by a neuropsychologist?
I actually think bio. mom may be right. Giving stimulants to a child who doesn't have ADHD can cause all sorts of problems and I'm wondering if his diagnosis is right. The Connors test alone is pretty useless. Kids with early bipolar and autism will also score "yes" for ADHD on the Connors, but that doesn't mean that's all that's going on. Has he ever acted suicidal? Talked about suicide?
The therapist doesn't sound very useful/helpful. Have you thought of taking him to somebody with more credentials? Is hub REALLY ok with only seeing son on that sort of limited basis? Does he not want to maybe find out if more is going on with his child? How does he feel about it? Are there any psychiatric problems on either side of his family tree? He sounds like more than ADHD to me--I'd at least want to explore it before hub only has his own child once every two weeks for a few hours. That's very little contact.

 

[stepmom47]

He has seen a Reg. psychiatric...she is the one who told us (after one session) that if we let him live with his mom he would stop all this.

Last year I called to make an appointment. with a neuropsychologist and she will not see him, she is the one who told me to take him to the Behavioral Health Center and that things would only progress.

At this point there is no diagnosis

He has been on Concerta already, he was never deemed sucidal. He has shown no tendincies...in my opinion...the stealing of the knives makes me concerened and he is not medicated at this time.

Yes, husband is very unhappy about the whole situation! At this point his hands seem tied.
He wants to try everything and anything, but "the wall" is not giving.

Bio-mom is unwilling to try other things...she is just letting this stuff slide and thinks that everything else is a waste of money and time.

I agree that Bi-Polar could be an option...

As far as family,(either side) not that I know of...but of course you would have to be willing to get help to know that...lol

 

[daralex]

I don't have any real advice, but wanted to extend ((HUGS)) and say I'm so sorry for the heartache you're enduring! It still sounds like there needs to be more of a diagnosis to work with, but you can't have all that going on in your home especially with the little ones there. Hopefully someone else will have better advice. Sorry all of this is going on!!!
-Dara