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<blockquote data-quote="Gran2Angels" data-source="post: 598594" data-attributes="member: 8951"><p>Thanks for the support and hugs.</p><p></p><p>Tiredof33, Thank you for what you said and for sharing about your situation. I am ashamed because I feel bad that I just want to be as far away from her as possible. Unless of course she was to change. Oh, wouldn't that be great. I think that is the key for me, I know longer have faith that she will change. This just seems to be who she is. I hate it.</p><p></p><p>Yesterday was father's day and also the birthday of my 80 year old ex-father in law, that I am still very close to. The two grands, easy child and his daughter and I went to the surprise dinner. My ex-husbands sister-in-law cornered me with a lecture to not give up on difficult child. She just kept saying that to me. That difficult child will make a turn around. I stood there and took it, and simply said thank you. I have no energy to go into it all with her.... like I could lay out the past twelve - thirteen years effectively for her to understand the gravity of all anyway. People were asking where difficult child was staying and how she is doing. The honest answer is the last time I saw her was two weeks ago, on the side of the road with no money, no gas in her disabled car and no where to go. Just pulled over in the grass and mad at the world. I pulled along side and offered to take her for help. She yelled at me saying the only help she needed was a room for the night to shower and sleep (that she had been in her car and hadn't slept for 3 days - which according to a friend, wasn't true), something to eat and some gas and cig money. I told her if I gave her those things, she would just need them again tomorrow - that she needed HELP. She told me where to go. So I rolled up my car window and left her there. Cried all the way back to work, fixed my make-up and went into my office as if at had never happened. I was just dying inside........ BUT of course I didn't tell that little sad story at the party. I just said I hadn't spoke with her and she hadn't seen the kids in a while. I left the party feeling small. Once again. They don't get it.</p><p></p><p>As of the past few days she has turned up the home of 82 year old step dad. My sister lives with him and is a care-taker of sorts. She doesn't really want difficult child there but I guess difficult child asked my step dad and he wants to give her a chance. My sister says difficult child sleeps most of the day and up most of the night. I don't like it and don't think she should be there. I am sure it will end badly. I guess my hands are tied.</p><p></p><p>Thanks again. This board of experience means the world to me.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Gran2Angels, post: 598594, member: 8951"] Thanks for the support and hugs. Tiredof33, Thank you for what you said and for sharing about your situation. I am ashamed because I feel bad that I just want to be as far away from her as possible. Unless of course she was to change. Oh, wouldn't that be great. I think that is the key for me, I know longer have faith that she will change. This just seems to be who she is. I hate it. Yesterday was father's day and also the birthday of my 80 year old ex-father in law, that I am still very close to. The two grands, easy child and his daughter and I went to the surprise dinner. My ex-husbands sister-in-law cornered me with a lecture to not give up on difficult child. She just kept saying that to me. That difficult child will make a turn around. I stood there and took it, and simply said thank you. I have no energy to go into it all with her.... like I could lay out the past twelve - thirteen years effectively for her to understand the gravity of all anyway. People were asking where difficult child was staying and how she is doing. The honest answer is the last time I saw her was two weeks ago, on the side of the road with no money, no gas in her disabled car and no where to go. Just pulled over in the grass and mad at the world. I pulled along side and offered to take her for help. She yelled at me saying the only help she needed was a room for the night to shower and sleep (that she had been in her car and hadn't slept for 3 days - which according to a friend, wasn't true), something to eat and some gas and cig money. I told her if I gave her those things, she would just need them again tomorrow - that she needed HELP. She told me where to go. So I rolled up my car window and left her there. Cried all the way back to work, fixed my make-up and went into my office as if at had never happened. I was just dying inside........ BUT of course I didn't tell that little sad story at the party. I just said I hadn't spoke with her and she hadn't seen the kids in a while. I left the party feeling small. Once again. They don't get it. As of the past few days she has turned up the home of 82 year old step dad. My sister lives with him and is a care-taker of sorts. She doesn't really want difficult child there but I guess difficult child asked my step dad and he wants to give her a chance. My sister says difficult child sleeps most of the day and up most of the night. I don't like it and don't think she should be there. I am sure it will end badly. I guess my hands are tied. Thanks again. This board of experience means the world to me. [/QUOTE]
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