It's probably me...

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by witzend, Jan 12, 2010.

  1. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    These conversations with husband just kill me sometimes. But he is the man I married. It's not like it should be a big surprise. It's just tiring sometimes.

    Yesterday - he did a chore for me that had been waiting for days. He dragged up all of his tools, and got my little screwdriver out of the kitchen drawer as well. Hours later, I ask if he will please put away his tools. They're all laying right together with my little screwdriver. You know the screwdriver got left out. It's not his tool.

    With the new puppy, the sliding door is getting quite the workout. It's pretty heavy and hard for me to push/pull, and it started sticking. Please look into it? "Here's what it's not." Yes, but it's still sticking. "But it's not off it's track. I picked some dog hair out of the track and that didn't fix it. I didn't fix it." Fifth time out this morning, I get the WD-40 out and fix it.

    "husband, when the puppy wakes up, take it out to potty right away." We're all ready for bed, puppy is sleeping, I ask if he is coming in, and he has woken up the puppy and is petting it. Puppy follows me into the bedroom and pees on the lambskin rug.

    husband is now supposed to ride his bike that we bought him for this purpose to the light rail. We bought the bike in December, he canceled his parking space as of 1/1, he's been driving to the light rail. He tells me last night "I'll start riding tomorrow, and every day I don't I'll pay $5." Huh? Well, he'll take that much less in allowance. "Give me a break, husband! You always take your allowance then go get more because you spent it on World of Warcraft and want to go out to lunch too! Let's go to bed!"

    husband oversleeps his alarm. Again. Has for 24 years. I have my alarm on. I get him up. I tell him to turn on my coffee pot while I feed the dogs. He starts messing with the grinds. Just turn it on. He gets his breakfast and sits down in front of the computer to read his e-mails and his WoW site. I shut the door on him because he's messing with the puppy, and tell him to hurry up. It's nearly 7:30. Fifteen minutes later, I tell him to hurry up. He comes out of the computer room with his cereal, starts watching TV and playing with the puppy. I said "hurry up", not come out here and play with the puppy.

    He finishes breakfast and takes a shower. Comes out, puts on his shoes and the puppy plays with his laces. He fusses with the puppy about his laces. Just put on your shoes and go! He leaves at 8:15. Can't figure out why he never gets off work until 6:00 or later. You're 50 years old! Get to work on time before they figure it's a job for a younger man!

    I'm tired and want to take a nap. This is the first day he's ridden his bike, and we have discussed my possibly driving him and his bike home until he gets into better shape, as it is mostly uphill. Not that he's actually committed to anything, but it's only been discussed and mostly by me. He calls about something or other. I ask him what his plans are for after work. In an annoyed tone I get the "Well, other than coming home I don't have anything planned after that! Harumph!" That's not what I mean. How are you getting home? "Well if you're not going to drive me then I guess I'll ride my bike." I didn't say that. Can you just answer me? "Well I don't know what you're going to do!" This isn't about what I'm going to do. I asked you how you are getting home. Am I coming to get you or are you riding your bike from the station? "Harumph! I guess I'll call you from X station and then you can meet me at the bike locker."

    Why can't you get a literal answer to a literal question? And why am I the witch when I ask for a plan, when all of our prior conversations have consisted of grunts and spaced out looks on his end?
     
  2. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    See? And MY MOTHER wonders WHY I can drop a transmission. ;)
     
  3. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    I forgot the soft-soap. Two weeks ago we ran out. He looked under our bathroom sink where we keep it and the refill bottle had a few dribbles in it. So when we went to the store he picked up a bottle of soft-soap refill, filled the dispensers, and left it on the counter. Days later I finally put it away under the bathroom sink. We're washing our hands a lot with the puppy, so we run out in the kitchen. "Where's the soft-soap?" It's under the sink in the bathroom, husband. "No it's not." Maybe it's in the pantry, but it's one or the other. Lots of slamming, then he comes out of the bathroom with the soft-soap dispenser and puts it next to the kitchen sink. Nice. No soap in the bathroom.

    So, after he leaves this morning I go in under the bathroom sink, right where I thought it would be is the soft-soap. I fill up the kitchen sink dispenser and put the bathroom one away. For now, I am leaving the refill on the counter. He'll swear he didn't see it. Well DUH you didn't see it! What's that got to do with anything?
     
  4. Shari

    Shari IsItFridayYet?

    I suspect asking for the plan actually means committing to some level of change. Don't you know ignoring things makes them just go away???? Silly you.

    I asked for a plan last night and finally got "Ok, I'll beat her or something". Guess that's a plan...

    And what is it with people right now....holy moly. DHDA-itis, I think.

    As for the soft soap, don't you know about the uterine homing device? Men cant find anything because they don't have one, and aside from being able to work the miracle of baby making, its also a homing device for everything lost in the universe...At least that's what I've been told.

    Sorry, Witz, that your husband is being a pita.
     
  5. flutterby

    flutterby Fly away!

    With all of the husband stuff going on lately...well let's just say, I'm sooooooooo glad I'm not married.

    Not helpful, I know. Sorry.

    But, I am really glad I'm not married.
     
  6. GoingNorth

    GoingNorth Crazy Cat Lady

    I don't regret the twenty five years I spent married to a wonderful husband, but I also know how lucky I was!

    I sure as heck can't see "housebreaking" one at my age.
     
  7. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    :hammer: Yup, he's a difficult child, Witz -- face it! I got me one, too!
     
  8. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    Geez, witz, another difficult child on your hands. I remember husband sleeping until the last possible moment to get to work on time. I hated that & he knew I would get him up because we couldn't afford for him to lose his job. I felt I was being held hostage.

    During our 20th anniversary getaway, husband & I discussed some of this. He actually told me that to get my attention he to pull some of these stunts ~ the tweedles had me buried & he couldn't find me amidst all the fires & meltdowns. I wasn't aware of how much I'd been ignoring him (not consciously).

    Other than the above I wouldn't hazard to guess why the day to day nonsense. Is this how his parents communicated?

    Ick, ick, ick. Here's hoping tomorrow is a more decisive day in the witz household.
     
  9. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    husband's can be real pains sometimes.

    My dad is the WORST. In many ways he is great. Truly a loving, caring man.

    He does NOT do housework unless it is his idea. At that time a female is supposed to get everything set up so that he can do it. If he is going to grill out then Mom or I (if I am over there) must get the meat ready, prepare all sides, clean off the picnic table or the stuff he plopped onto the table. He will carry the meat out and MAYBE bring that plate inside. If he brings it in he puts it on the table and not near the sink,

    ALL he does is cook the meat, but he expects praise for every facet of the meal. It is annoying.

    He also has what I call a "garbage can memory". Annoyingly he passed it to me. Various and sundry factoids stick. they NEVER go away if they get stuck in there. NEVER. He wanders about spouting random factoids at whomever is there. You are expected to listen and remember - for me at least there is a quiz. I am supposed to remember all the stuff he spouts off about. All day.

    My mother cannot keep a train of thought. Ever. He wanders into the room and spouts off and spouts about something. Whatever.

    It is very hard to do anything with that going on. Sending those factoids out and expecting you to remember them means you must stop what you are doing to pay attention to him. If you do not remember then he gets upset and his feelings get hurt. It is just obnoxious.

    husband's can be a real PITA.
     
  10. Mattsmom277

    Mattsmom277 Active Member

    This must be something catchy lol.
    I adore my S/O and he's a terrific guy. But some days I tell ya!!

    He has a thing about getting up too. Drives me crazy. I don't sleep well to begin with, a MS thing. Finally have gotten difficult child to get up on his own for school. I was up late with easy child who is home sick. She knew her medicine was on the table for morning and to please let me sleep unless she needs more than her medications, toast, etc which she can handle.

    S/O's alarm is on MY side of the bed. (Of course, PERFECT sense !!)It goes off. I hit snooze, tap S/O, time to wake up yada yada. 10 minutes later, alarm again. Same thing, tap, time to get up. Again 10 minutes later. Alarm goes. I bolted out of bed, told him he now had 8 minutes to get ready because his ride will be here. He had to shave, dress, brush teeth, pack his books and materials for classes, and getting dressed for outdoors in Canadian winter takes a bit of time. Of course, Im rallied to get up, gather his books and materials, find his wallet, and get difficult child out of the bathroom. difficult child doesn't go into the bathroom to get ready on school days until 10 minutes before S/O must leave. But after that, difficult child is scrambling himself. So kicking him out and leaving him rushing for classes, when he left the bathroom available for S/O, is completely unfair. I finally told S/O that when he pulls this, then I am first off, cut short of a rare chance to catch up on some sleep. I am then scrambling to get HIM ready. Then I have to cope with a upset difficult child who is himself left srambling, grouchy and needing me for this that and the other thing. All so that S/O gets that extra 20-30 minutes sleep. That sleep of course being during the time I"m dealing with his alarm going off. I'm not sleeping that extra time!

    I have made a decision to not wake him up again. period. Just like children who rely too much on parents, I'm going to let him face natural consequences.

    I'm grateful I have few pet peeves with S/O. My nerves can't take it lol
     
  11. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    Maybe you can trade him in for another puppy?
     
  12. AnnieO

    AnnieO Shooting from the Hip

    Wow, is it time for husband-PITA???

    Witz... The soap got me going... So true. Tools, too.

    Lots of hugs. Maybe you can do what Shari was going to do to her husband, put the lambskin rug on husband's pillow???
     
  13. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    Firstly, let me say that I am bound and determined that we both are going to start getting up at a decent hour in the morning. I have never been a help in the morning and there's no reason I can't get up early enough to make sure that everyone is up and running and that my own day isn't starting at noon.

    This morning we are up at 6:00 AM. My alarm goes off as I am already in the bathroom. His isn't working and he won't buy a new one. I finish up and go turn it off. By then, the little one is whining to get out of his crate at the foot of our bed, and husband is still laying in bed. I let the other dogs out while I pull on my pants, my uggs, and my coat. Puppy is now barking. I let the dogs in, open the crate, get the puppy, struggle to pick him up instead of letting him run to pee on the rug. It's difficult for me to stand up at all, let alone stand up with a squirming puppy in hand.

    I take puppy out, he pees, sniffs around, etc. It's been 9 minutes since the alarm went off. husband is still in bed when I come back in. I ask him, "You're not really still laying in bed, are you?" "I'm not!" said as he is still laying in bed.:mad: Well, husband it seems to me that actually are still laying in bed! Big put upon groan, and he gets out of the bed.

    I feed the dogs, get my coffee, and he rolls out about 5 minutes later. I tell him to get his breakfast, which he takes to the computer room. I remind him that if he doesn't want to watch the puppy, he needs to close the door on him. He brings the puppy in with him. Two minutes later, he lets the puppy out. Thirty minutes later he has finished his bowl of cereal, and comes out. During this time I have taken the puppy out twice, paid the bills, balanced the checkbook, eaten my breakfast standing up, recycled the junk mail, and swept and cleaned under the dog crate.

    Big hassle for him, I ask him to check the rat trap in the garage so he can toss it before he leaves if there's something in it. There's not. Then he sits for 1/2 an hour. He's been up for two hours, and just now is getting out of the shower and has been in front of his computer again for the last 10 minutes.

    The man is always tired. Is it just me, or does it seem like you could sleep longer and still be to work on time if you just didn't sit around reading web pages and staring at tv? Mind you, he is riding a light rail train to work that has wireless internet and he is taking his laptop with him. Why not do it on the train?
     
  14. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Now I know why I am so glad that Tony is working out of town!

    Really. We get along so much better when he is gone during the week. We talk on the phone whenever we want, at least an hour at night. This is more than we talk if he is home...lol. On weekends we do what we need to do and actually tend to enjoy being with each other.

    Gosh I hope he keeps working out of town!
     
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