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<blockquote data-quote="Signorina" data-source="post: 526977"><p>Nancy I have so much I want to write and yet I don't think I can do it justice on my phone. You described me and how I feel 95%. The only place we differ...and it's just a tiny bit...is that my need to be prepared and "do something" doesn't stem from worry. It's actually how I avoid worry. I like having my "t's" crossed and my "i's" dotted just in case...and I want a contingency plan and I always want to "hit the ground running. "</p><p></p><p>My mom is a hand wringer and an awfuliser. My dad set out to teach me to make a good informed decision without looking back but also to know my stuff and be prepared. And to be able to take a different route(or a restart) if it didn't work out. An a, a b, and a c plan and then go for it. But to make a choice instead of hemming and hawing and getting stuck. Can you tell that my dad was my greatest roll model? </p><p></p><p>It's why I am here. I get that I can't do anything. "Each day I wake up with the desperate need to do something...and realize there is nothing I can do; the emptiness just has to be..."</p><p></p><p>But should the time come when I get the opportunity to do something-a tiny glimmer of opportunity--I want to be prepared. And you guys are my guidance. </p><p></p><p>And the wannabe overachiever inside me knows I must detach, can't fix this, yada yada yada-and being here helps me accomplish that. At least it's something to do.</p><p></p><p>And when I do dwell, get scared, freak out, ache, hurt, and WORRY-I lean on you all instead of internalizing it. Or worse, trying to change HIM. Love you guys</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Signorina, post: 526977"] Nancy I have so much I want to write and yet I don't think I can do it justice on my phone. You described me and how I feel 95%. The only place we differ...and it's just a tiny bit...is that my need to be prepared and "do something" doesn't stem from worry. It's actually how I avoid worry. I like having my "t's" crossed and my "i's" dotted just in case...and I want a contingency plan and I always want to "hit the ground running. " My mom is a hand wringer and an awfuliser. My dad set out to teach me to make a good informed decision without looking back but also to know my stuff and be prepared. And to be able to take a different route(or a restart) if it didn't work out. An a, a b, and a c plan and then go for it. But to make a choice instead of hemming and hawing and getting stuck. Can you tell that my dad was my greatest roll model? It's why I am here. I get that I can't do anything. "Each day I wake up with the desperate need to do something...and realize there is nothing I can do; the emptiness just has to be..." But should the time come when I get the opportunity to do something-a tiny glimmer of opportunity--I want to be prepared. And you guys are my guidance. And the wannabe overachiever inside me knows I must detach, can't fix this, yada yada yada-and being here helps me accomplish that. At least it's something to do. And when I do dwell, get scared, freak out, ache, hurt, and WORRY-I lean on you all instead of internalizing it. Or worse, trying to change HIM. Love you guys [/QUOTE]
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