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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 590309" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>It doesn't. It can help you in your home. But in the big picture, the world does not structure itself for our kids and they have to learn to deal with life on it's terms. Our home is not a residential treatment center, it's a home. And dare I say the times my kids, including difficult child's, did not go to sleep at EXACTLY the same time every night or had their meals later or earlier, it still didn't scar their development nor help it. But all three of my difficult children (35, Sonic and Julie) have done FAR better than I expected or anyone expected. None are disorganized like me either. And once kids get to be teens it is pretty hard to keep them rigidly on schedule. Most likely, they will rebel against extremes. </p><p></p><p>So if you and I are a little more lax, because it is our personality, I really can't see it hurting our kids. My #1 reason is that the world will not conform to their rigidity and they MUST get used to an inflexible world. Sonic has done that superbly! This is just my opinion, and as you see (gulp), most posters don't agree with me, but I think that if it's not your nature to have an uber-exact schedule, it won't hurt J. Now if you keep him awake until midnight, yes. If you skip meals, sure. If you act erratically, yes. But if you put him to bed between 7:30 and 9:00 depending, I just don't see it as a huge issue. Unless YOU notice it as one, it probably isn't one. See what is necessary for J. Not all difficult child's are the same. </p><p></p><p>I am really a believer that our kids have to learn to deal in the world as it is. Not that I was disorganized on purpose. I'm STILL disorganized because I am not an organized person. My poor dogs!!! <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 590309, member: 1550"] It doesn't. It can help you in your home. But in the big picture, the world does not structure itself for our kids and they have to learn to deal with life on it's terms. Our home is not a residential treatment center, it's a home. And dare I say the times my kids, including difficult child's, did not go to sleep at EXACTLY the same time every night or had their meals later or earlier, it still didn't scar their development nor help it. But all three of my difficult children (35, Sonic and Julie) have done FAR better than I expected or anyone expected. None are disorganized like me either. And once kids get to be teens it is pretty hard to keep them rigidly on schedule. Most likely, they will rebel against extremes. So if you and I are a little more lax, because it is our personality, I really can't see it hurting our kids. My #1 reason is that the world will not conform to their rigidity and they MUST get used to an inflexible world. Sonic has done that superbly! This is just my opinion, and as you see (gulp), most posters don't agree with me, but I think that if it's not your nature to have an uber-exact schedule, it won't hurt J. Now if you keep him awake until midnight, yes. If you skip meals, sure. If you act erratically, yes. But if you put him to bed between 7:30 and 9:00 depending, I just don't see it as a huge issue. Unless YOU notice it as one, it probably isn't one. See what is necessary for J. Not all difficult child's are the same. I am really a believer that our kids have to learn to deal in the world as it is. Not that I was disorganized on purpose. I'm STILL disorganized because I am not an organized person. My poor dogs!!! :) [/QUOTE]
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