Judge Made Her Decision

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by pasajes4, Dec 11, 2012.

  1. pasajes4

    pasajes4 Well-Known Member

    The judge sentenced my son to 9 months in a youth treatment facility and to 9 months after care supervision. The victim read his victim impact statement in which he made several false accusations. The judge did call his hand on those. Her decision was based on the fact that the victim lives down the street. My son became very upset and wanted me to be able to hug him much like a 5 year old would do. He was not able to get that hug and he just sobbed until I could not hold back the tears. It was one of the hardest days of my life. My son needs to face the consequences of his actions and I don't dispute that. On the other hand, he is my son and my heart hurts. I honestly do not think that he thought this would be the outcome.
  2. tammybackagain

    tammybackagain New Member

    So Sorry, I do know what you are going through but now you 1 know where he is and that he is in a safe enviorment, 2 will be getting the help he needs. Does the facility he's going to have family counciling, vistation?
  3. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Oh Pasa, I am so sorry, those gut wrenching moments when our difficult child's are sobbing like that when reality has set in, just about do me in every time. I am sending a cyber hug for your hurting mom heart, prayers that your son gets the help he needs and that you find peace of mind amidst all of it. I really understand why this would be one of the hardest days of your life, I really get that...........(((HUGS))))
  4. Sheila

    Sheila Moderator

    So sorry. Big hug:crying:
  5. DDD

    DDD Well-Known Member

    I understand. It is mindboggling to cope with the reality. on the other hand, do you believe that he might actually benefit from this sentence? So much depends on the location and the focus of the community enforcement agencies. My fingers are crossed and my heart is heavy. I really take these posts to heart and am sending very very caring hugs of support.
  6. Calamity Jane

    Calamity Jane Well-Known Member

    Oh P, I'm so sorry. Please hang in there, I know tonight is awful, we're all thinking of you and difficult child.
  7. PatriotsGirl

    PatriotsGirl Guest

    I am so sorry!! Hopefully there are services for him there...
  8. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    I am so sorry that you couldn't give him that hug. I am sending cyber hugs to both of you. I hope the facility will be able to give him the help he needs.
  9. JKF

    JKF Well-Known Member

    I'm so sorry pasajes! I know how heartbroken you feel. Sending lots of hugs and support your way!
    Last edited: Dec 11, 2012
  10. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    I'm sorry...that must have been so hard.
  11. Jody

    Jody Active Member

    I am so sorry. many hugs to you.
  12. Anxworrier

    Anxworrier New Member

    I am so sorry for you both! I cannot imagine how gut wrenching that must have been. I pray he gets the help he needs and that this will be a learning experience not just punitive. And I pray for strength for you during this time ahead too!
  13. JJJ

    JJJ Active Member

  14. Marcie Mac

    Marcie Mac Just Plain Ole Tired

    Sorry to read this - mine has spent Xmas in jail before and it really kills the spirit of the holiday

  15. DammitJanet

    DammitJanet Well-Known Member Staff Member

    Im sorry Pasa. I imagine this will take a little bit before he is actually transferred. Can you get to juvie for an inperson visit before he transfers? Do they allow hugs there? Will they allow you to touch at the youth facility? I know some do and some dont.

    Im really hoping that you have caught him in time when he is under the juvenile age where this will catch his attention and he can have this removed from his record if he keeps his nose clean once he gets out. That will be his saving grace.
  16. Mattsmom277

    Mattsmom277 Active Member

    I really hope this is a wake up for him, and that he uses this period of time to learn learn learn and to decide to do things different 9 months from now. At the same time, I'm so sorry for you're hurting mom heart, and for not being able to give him a hug. I'll give you one. HUGS!
  17. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    I have to admit to getting a little teary when I read your post. I'm so sorry.
  18. recoveringenabler

    recoveringenabler Well-Known Member Staff Member

    I'm thinking of you Pasa, I hope you can have a calm day today.........sending lots of gentle and caring hugs your way..............
  19. Oh Pasa, how awful. I'm so sorry for your broken heart. It doesn't matter that he needs to face the consequences, it still hurts to see our children crushed like that and not be able to go to them.

    Big hugs to you. Prayers for strength and a coming of peace over your heart. Prayers for strength for your difficult child too and a recognition that this is an opportunity to learn, make some headway with his behaviour and maturity, and to turn things around for himself.
  20. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Many hugs and peaceful thoughts for you, Pasa. I'm so sorry such a heart breaking thing has happened. Is the name youth treatment facility just another name for jail or is it truly a treatment facility? I hope it is....and if anything good is to come from this, I hope he can benefit from that. As you said, no matter if he deserves it or not, it is sad. You do not deserve that pain. I hope you can vent and express yourself here and with others throughout the time. Hugs available at any time......