Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Just because you re senile doesn{t mean you re stupid
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="rlsnights" data-source="post: 417452" data-attributes="member: 7948"><p>I didn't go back and read your previous threads so I may be totally off base. If so please forgive me. But we are in a continual struggle with this issue ourselves with not one but two extended family members.</p><p></p><p>If she's not conserved then she does indeed legally have the right to go live anywhere she likes - whether it's smart or not, whether she has the money or not, whether it's dangerous or not. If it is not safe, etc then a petition for conservatorship needs to be filed and the matter heard in court or at the minimum brought to the attention of Adult Protective Services.</p><p></p><p>If she is not conserved and you do not agree with her plan, then you can tell her that you feel very strongly that it is not safe for her to return to her apt. If it was me, I would also tell her that my conscience would not allow me to help her do something that I thought was dangerous and I wouldn't discuss it anymore. Then you have to hold to that. If necessary I would tell her that I would have to leave if she insisted on continuing to talk about it. And then I would do it. </p><p></p><p>If she is conserved then that is another matter. If the conservator has determined that it is not safe for her to return to her home then the decision is out of her hands.</p><p></p><p>That either needs to be made clear to her or not depending on her cognitive/psychiatric condition. If she is suffering from dementia or psychosis to the extent that she is delusional then there is no point in any kind of rational discussion with her at all. She is not rational and not capable of being rational. You might as well hit your head against a brick wall.</p><p></p><p>To argue with her is to participate in the delusion that she has the power to decide this.</p><p></p><p>If no one has told her where she will live once she is well enough to leave her current placement then that should be done if it seems appropriate. If it's not certain she will leave where she's at then I would tell her that - again if it seems appropriate.</p><p></p><p>If it's not appropriate to be straightforward with her due to agitation, etc. then I would tell her whatever she wants to hear and let her talk all she wants about her plans for going back to her apt. I would also try to get her to talk about other things that are less (for you) uncomfortable subjects and reminiscences.</p><p></p><p>I do not think this is cruel. It is the only rational response in this situation.</p><p></p><p>Patricia</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rlsnights, post: 417452, member: 7948"] I didn't go back and read your previous threads so I may be totally off base. If so please forgive me. But we are in a continual struggle with this issue ourselves with not one but two extended family members. If she's not conserved then she does indeed legally have the right to go live anywhere she likes - whether it's smart or not, whether she has the money or not, whether it's dangerous or not. If it is not safe, etc then a petition for conservatorship needs to be filed and the matter heard in court or at the minimum brought to the attention of Adult Protective Services. If she is not conserved and you do not agree with her plan, then you can tell her that you feel very strongly that it is not safe for her to return to her apt. If it was me, I would also tell her that my conscience would not allow me to help her do something that I thought was dangerous and I wouldn't discuss it anymore. Then you have to hold to that. If necessary I would tell her that I would have to leave if she insisted on continuing to talk about it. And then I would do it. If she is conserved then that is another matter. If the conservator has determined that it is not safe for her to return to her home then the decision is out of her hands. That either needs to be made clear to her or not depending on her cognitive/psychiatric condition. If she is suffering from dementia or psychosis to the extent that she is delusional then there is no point in any kind of rational discussion with her at all. She is not rational and not capable of being rational. You might as well hit your head against a brick wall. To argue with her is to participate in the delusion that she has the power to decide this. If no one has told her where she will live once she is well enough to leave her current placement then that should be done if it seems appropriate. If it's not certain she will leave where she's at then I would tell her that - again if it seems appropriate. If it's not appropriate to be straightforward with her due to agitation, etc. then I would tell her whatever she wants to hear and let her talk all she wants about her plans for going back to her apt. I would also try to get her to talk about other things that are less (for you) uncomfortable subjects and reminiscences. I do not think this is cruel. It is the only rational response in this situation. Patricia [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
General Discussions
The Watercooler
Just because you re senile doesn{t mean you re stupid
Top