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The Watercooler
Just because you re senile doesn{t mean you re stupid
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 417536" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Terry--</p><p> </p><p>Like you, I have spent some time in the Alzheimers/Dementia wards interacting with patients....and it seems to me that many of them have "reality test questions".</p><p> </p><p>Let me explain - most of the patients were not 'completely gone'. Most of them drifted in and out of lucidity. [In fact, we had only one woman who was completely out of it and she was the easiest to deal with because we could just go along with anything she said and she was happy as a clam.] </p><p> </p><p>But for the rest - they did seem to realize that they were losing touch. I would notice that they would ask questions. "Where is my wife?", "Where is my house?", "Where are my children?", "Where are my things?", "Who is taking care of my dog?". For each person, the question they would ask was different....but they would ask me the same question each time they were feeling unsure. It was as though they were testing their sense of reality. What is real? What has happened to me? What is my life now?</p><p> </p><p>As hard as it is - I would answer their questions...over and over and over. The simple truth. </p><p>"I'm sorry - your wife has passed.", </p><p>"I'm sorry - your house has been sold. You live here now.", </p><p>"Your children are grown. They stop by every Saturday. Would you like to see the pictures from their last visit?",</p><p>"Some of your things are right here. See? Here is your recliner. Some of your things are with your children."</p><p>"I'm sorry - your dog has passed. His puppies live with your grandchildren. Do you want to see their pictures?"</p><p> </p><p>And there would be a moment of sadness. They would nod. They would look me in the eye and tell me "Thank you".</p><p> </p><p>You are right - your cousin is not stupid. She has a "sense" that something is not right.</p><p>If you can...give it to her straight.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm sorry your apartment has been rented. You live here now. See? Here are your things."</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 417536, member: 6546"] Terry-- Like you, I have spent some time in the Alzheimers/Dementia wards interacting with patients....and it seems to me that many of them have "reality test questions". Let me explain - most of the patients were not 'completely gone'. Most of them drifted in and out of lucidity. [In fact, we had only one woman who was completely out of it and she was the easiest to deal with because we could just go along with anything she said and she was happy as a clam.] But for the rest - they did seem to realize that they were losing touch. I would notice that they would ask questions. "Where is my wife?", "Where is my house?", "Where are my children?", "Where are my things?", "Who is taking care of my dog?". For each person, the question they would ask was different....but they would ask me the same question each time they were feeling unsure. It was as though they were testing their sense of reality. What is real? What has happened to me? What is my life now? As hard as it is - I would answer their questions...over and over and over. The simple truth. "I'm sorry - your wife has passed.", "I'm sorry - your house has been sold. You live here now.", "Your children are grown. They stop by every Saturday. Would you like to see the pictures from their last visit?", "Some of your things are right here. See? Here is your recliner. Some of your things are with your children." "I'm sorry - your dog has passed. His puppies live with your grandchildren. Do you want to see their pictures?" And there would be a moment of sadness. They would nod. They would look me in the eye and tell me "Thank you". You are right - your cousin is not stupid. She has a "sense" that something is not right. If you can...give it to her straight. "I'm sorry your apartment has been rented. You live here now. See? Here are your things." [/QUOTE]
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Just because you re senile doesn{t mean you re stupid
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