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Parent Emeritus
Just cant understand the reasoning, our difficult child is spinning out of control.
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<blockquote data-quote="cw_mi" data-source="post: 590913" data-attributes="member: 15803"><p>Well here another sort of update. </p><p>difficult child called the other day and asked my wife if she could spend the day with her this Sat. Now we have not seen her in close to 6 months difficult child has called and talked with my wife maybe 4 or 5 times. Just small talk nothing major. Now we have both talked about sitting down and doing some sort of group therapy but life sort of happens and we have not at this time. My wife is sort of freaked out about her the visit, she is excited to see her but has mixed emotions about the whole thing. My suggestion to her was to go to the local coffee shop. difficult child loved going there with us and having a capacinno. I think them doing that will sort of make it less personal and hopefully less awkward. I also suggested that no matter how she looks (weve heard she isnt eating well and her hygiene has fallen) dont say anything. If difficult child mentions the loser fiancé/child boy just roll with it. I know she is pretty stressed about it. I know she is worried that it isnt a sincere visit, that something is up. I agree with her on that, prom is coming up and difficult child doesnt work and her dad wont help her with anything. At some point they will have to talk about the big blow out night when difficult child left, but this probably isnt the time to do that. </p><p>Now as far as myself, I dont want to see her. There was a time I would have put difficult childs life before mine, not anymore. (remember difficult child is my stepdaughter) I still love her but have a lot of anger for her. I know its childish but I think its me being protective of my wife. All the things Ive seen my wife do for difficult child and difficult child just craps all over her. Even though I know this wont do anything , I sort of want to see difficult child learn her lesson for making these bad decisions. Again I know this is not very mature and in reality she wont learn from her mistakes..she never has in the past so why would she now. I do know Im making a plan of not being around for the day if I can help it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="cw_mi, post: 590913, member: 15803"] Well here another sort of update. difficult child called the other day and asked my wife if she could spend the day with her this Sat. Now we have not seen her in close to 6 months difficult child has called and talked with my wife maybe 4 or 5 times. Just small talk nothing major. Now we have both talked about sitting down and doing some sort of group therapy but life sort of happens and we have not at this time. My wife is sort of freaked out about her the visit, she is excited to see her but has mixed emotions about the whole thing. My suggestion to her was to go to the local coffee shop. difficult child loved going there with us and having a capacinno. I think them doing that will sort of make it less personal and hopefully less awkward. I also suggested that no matter how she looks (weve heard she isnt eating well and her hygiene has fallen) dont say anything. If difficult child mentions the loser fiancé/child boy just roll with it. I know she is pretty stressed about it. I know she is worried that it isnt a sincere visit, that something is up. I agree with her on that, prom is coming up and difficult child doesnt work and her dad wont help her with anything. At some point they will have to talk about the big blow out night when difficult child left, but this probably isnt the time to do that. Now as far as myself, I dont want to see her. There was a time I would have put difficult childs life before mine, not anymore. (remember difficult child is my stepdaughter) I still love her but have a lot of anger for her. I know its childish but I think its me being protective of my wife. All the things Ive seen my wife do for difficult child and difficult child just craps all over her. Even though I know this wont do anything , I sort of want to see difficult child learn her lesson for making these bad decisions. Again I know this is not very mature and in reality she wont learn from her mistakes..she never has in the past so why would she now. I do know Im making a plan of not being around for the day if I can help it. [/QUOTE]
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Just cant understand the reasoning, our difficult child is spinning out of control.
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