Just insure your laptop

[amazeofgrace]

so I had a "strength and needs" assessment with difficult child I's FSO and CMO SW's today. And the one lady bless her heart, feels I should not react or stand in difficult child I's way at all under any circumstances! When I explained there was no way in h - e -double drumsticks I was letting him snap my laptop in 1/2~!

She says "then I suggest you get Insurance on your laptop, because you can not react to anything he does or anything he breaks"!!!! Sorry lady I am only going to take so much and believe me it's alot, b4 I lose it, but physical assault and terroristic damages of my belongings are not going to be ignored!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[DammitJanet]

That is idiotic thinking on the part of people who have book learning but no real sense.

Where else in the real world are people going to sit back and allow some darned near full grown man to scream and carry on while he does property damage? Nope...aint gonna happen. He will find himself behind bars. It should make no difference if he is doing this at home.

 

[klmno]

[difficult child I's FSO and CMO SW's

I'm not sure what these intials stand for- so I'm going to cringe and bite my tongue as I ask this- are these people by in chance court ordered people to work with you and difficult child? If so, all I can say is that I'm not surprised.

 

[Christy]

Unbelievable!

 

[Andy]

???? I think I would get another opinion. You are just suppose to let difficult child I behave in anyway he wants?????

Sounds like a therapist my easy child went to when she was about 10 or 11 yrs old. He pretty much told us to let her set the evening schedule for the entire family (she gets to say when difficult child goes to bed). He also said he would see her one more time and if we needed more session (besides the two free ones) he would have to transfer her to another person who works with kids. I complained to our Human Resources that when employees take their kids to a therapist that the employer pays for the first 2 sessions, they better be assigned to someone who works with kids.

I guess I can see where they are coming from - however, have they ever lived with a raging difficult child in their house? Do they really think that letting the rage run its course will help? So, does everyone evacuate the house so that he can go room to room without harming anyone but it is o.k. for him to destroy the house?

 

[witzend]

I'd get the insurance, too. Although the deductible will make it probably not worthwhile...

She's an idiot.

 

[gcvmom]

Like I always say... reality is stranger than any fiction you can think of. That woman just takes the cake!

 

[meowbunny]

I do understand her logic. The less we react, the better chance most have of controlling the rage. I don't know your son but I know that my not reacting would create an even stronger and more destructive rage. For me, the best thing I could do was leave the house.

The first time I left, she tore the house apart. She wasn't allowed to leave the house except for school (and I sat outside of her classes to make sure she went) until she cleaned up all of the mess. Anything broken she had to pay for with a garage sale of her stuff. She never destroyed the house again -- just things in her room that weren't all that important to her. It always amazed me that while she truly couldn't control raging, she could control what she did in the rage. Somewhere in her is one of the best survival skills I've ever seen -- anything goes so long as it doesn't truly hurt her.

 

[busywend]

 

[hexemaus2]

I swear, it never ceases to amaze me the level of flat-out stupid that seems to permeate through the medical profession. Ugh!!

In this house? Ignoring a rage, or anything done during a rage, just escalates things. difficult child 2 will do more harm if we try to ignore his actions.

Class, can we spell MORON??

I wish I had some sage advice for you...or at least something beyond a mere "what an idiot." We've tried holding difficult child 2 accountable for his damages...all that has ever done is cause MORE meltdowns and rages...but doing nothing makes him think he doesn't have consequences. It's a vicious circle with him. I wish I had some ideas for you, but we're still struggling with the same kinds of things here. Just know that I sympathize with both the issues at hand, AND the morons without a clue who are trying to "help." It reminds me of the officer the other tell who was trying to convince me that the system really does work. HA!! Yeah, go sell that lie to someone else 'cause I won't EVER buy in. I know better. It's a rare occasion that the system "works."

 

[susiestar]

I must agree that these people are morons. While using less emotion in how you deal with your difficult child is often useful, flat out ignoring a rage is license to continue rages as often as you want because no one cares what you do when you rage. At least we had this experience. I can even remember Wiz laughing at a sw who told me to treat his rages this way. She was SHOCKED - and POSITIVE that he was kidding. I thought she was an idiot. I agreed to her face simply because I had challenged her idiotic, never-actually-lived-with-a-child-much-less-a-difficult child ideas in a previous meeting and it was a HUGE drama with her becoming convinced that I was my difficult child's main problem, NOT his skewed thinking. So I agreed to her face and told Wiz if he tried that **** when we were home his world would end.

guess what? My way worked, eventually.

Where do these people come from? Stupid therapists R us? I have become convinced that that is the name of the diploma mill that creates these individuals and hten sets them upon us hapless difficult child parents.

sorry you had to listen to this crud. Ignore it. But NOT the raging difficult child.

Susie